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Multi cultural societies have more advantage than drawbacks. Do you agree or disagree ? Support your opinion with examples.

Multi cultural societies have more advantage than drawbacks. Support your opinion with examples. M1Wq
In this modern scenario, it is commonly observed that countries are support to all culture and traditions. However, this essay gives certain rise of drawbacks but benefits are far more significant which I will shed light in following paragraphs. Admittedly, there are myriad reasons that why societies should be as multi cultural societies. Most importantly, since it is more sufficient way to come across regarding other rituals and ethics. Whenever human get knowledge about different cultures, they may easily create a solid bonding with foreign people and also it helps to improve their language barriers. Due to this people never find difficulties during travel to another country or states. For example, the Australia is one of most popular country in the world. This country is endowed with multi cosmopolitan culture as it encourage to overseas immigration and students. Further more, in case all people are living under the one roof, it can reduce the discrimination and corruption between countries as well as residents. They can enjoy all functions and festivals together when they are live in outer areas. In spite of such justification I believe that if there are numbers of cultural and traditions then people may be distrac from there own religion. Mostly youngster would be follow to western societies by wearing clothes, speaking foreign language and so on. Therefore their own religion and traditions may disrupt. In conclusion it is apparent that although multi cultural societies have some causes but I think advantages are more valuable, it is positive trend that should be welcomed
In this modern scenario, it is
commonly
observed that
countries
are support to all culture and traditions.
However
, this essay gives certain rise of drawbacks
but
benefits are far more significant which I will shed light in following paragraphs.
Admittedly
, there are myriad reasons that why
societies
should be as multi cultural
societies
. Most
importantly
, since it is more sufficient way to
come
across regarding other rituals and ethics. Whenever human
get
knowledge about
different
cultures, they may
easily
create a solid bonding with foreign
people
and
also
it
helps
to
improve
their language barriers. Due to this
people
never find difficulties during travel to another
country
or states.
For example
, the Australia is one of most popular
country
in the world. This
country
is endowed
with multi cosmopolitan culture as it encourage to overseas immigration and students.
Further
more, in case all
people
are living under the one roof, it can
reduce
the discrimination and corruption between
countries
as well
as residents. They can enjoy all functions and festivals together when they are
live
in outer areas.
In spite of
such justification I believe that if there are numbers of cultural and traditions then
people
may be
distrac
from there
own
religion.
Mostly
youngster would be
follow
to western
societies
by wearing clothes, speaking foreign language and
so
on.
Therefore
their
own
religion and traditions may disrupt. In
conclusion it
is apparent that although multi cultural
societies
have
some
causes
but
I
think
advantages are more valuable, it is
positive
trend that should be
welcomed
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The most intimate temper of a people, its deepest soul, is above all in its language.
Jules Michelet

IELTS essay Multi cultural societies have more advantage than drawbacks. Support your opinion with examples.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
255 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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