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Motivating person you know

Motivating person you know 1a0AA
The person I am encouraged by the most in undoubtedlymy first english teacher Mr Jurayev. Talking about his appearances, I can say he is quite well-built -man with twinkling black eyes and sharp crooked nose. He is shorter than normal but he never seems simple with his solemn face. In fact, I was intimidated by the way he stared at me with his piercing eyes on the very day I was introduced to him in his office. However, talking to him in person, you discover that he has ingenuine love and devotion towards his job. He never seems to fail, perhaps that is because he strives to do thing perfectly. Besides he is always helpful. Trying to lend a helping hand to anyone who needs it, no matter how busy he is. He always repeats the same note. "Failure is the proof, the desire was not strong enough. With this he repeatedly made us work at times when we felt desperate. Today, though it had been 4 years since we have been working seperately, we have remained inseperable as a mentor and an apprentise. Because the influence he has had an our society is immensely huge.
The person I
am encouraged
by the most in
undoubtedlymy
first
english
teacher Mr
Jurayev
. Talking about his appearances, I can say he is quite well-built -
man
with twinkling black eyes and sharp crooked nose. He is shorter than normal
but
he never seems simple with his solemn face. In fact, I
was intimidated
by the way he stared at me with his piercing eyes on the
very
day I
was introduced
to him in his office.
However
, talking to him in person, you discover that he has
ingenuine
love
and devotion towards his job. He never seems to fail, perhaps
that is
because
he strives to do thing
perfectly
.
Besides
he is always helpful. Trying to lend a helping hand to anyone who needs it, no matter how busy he is. He always repeats the same note.
"
Failure is the proof, the desire was not strong
enough
. With this he
repeatedly
made us work at times when we felt desperate.
Today
, though it had been 4 years since we have been working
seperately
, we have remained
inseperable
as a mentor and an
apprentise
.
Because
the influence he has had
an our society
is
immensely
huge.
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IELTS essay Motivating person you know

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
196 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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