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Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves.

Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. GQym
When it comes to crime related to youths, it is often argued that teenagers should accomplish their punishment period at the special zones rather than put them on bars with adults. There are many reasons which involve these issues. From my point of view, due to the advantages far outweigh the disadvantages, I absolutely agree with this statement. To begin with, we know that the teenager period is considered the transfer period. At this time due to some hormonal changes in the teenagers' behavior is observed some psychological crises. As adolescents will prone to commit a crime with do not realize their actions wholly. At that time it would be a not good idea to put them in prison with adults as a punishment. The purpose of punishing should rehabilitate people and rehabilitate the teenagers is easier and more possible than adults. Because one can find very dangerous criminalists in the prison who can show bad impact to teenagers’ behavior who are put in prison with adult criminalists. Eventually, people who engage with criminalist teenager to rehabilitate came across many difficulties during work with them. As a result, the number of criminalists would increase instead of decrease. As a piece of evidence, according to global survey result more than 70% of teenagers and adolescents commit crime again after punished in adults prison. In conclusion, in fact, nowadays the number of crime is improving among the youth generation than in past, but I think we can rehabilitate them by giving impact through special punishes.
When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
related to youths, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
should accomplish their punishment period at the special zones
rather
than put them on bars with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons which involve these issues. From my point of view, due to the advantages far outweigh the disadvantages, I
absolutely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, we know that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenager
period
is considered
the transfer period. At this time due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
hormonal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
' behavior
is observed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
psychological crises.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
adolescents will prone to commit a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
with do not realize their actions wholly. At that time it would be a not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
to put them in prison with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
as a punishment. The purpose of punishing should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rehabilitate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rehabilitate
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
is easier and more possible than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
one can find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
Possible spelling mistake found.
criminalists
in the prison who can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
impact to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers’
behavior who
are put
in prison with adult
Possible spelling mistake found.
criminalists
.
Eventually
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who engage with
Possible spelling mistake found.
criminalist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenager
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rehabilitate
came across
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
difficulties during work with them.
As a result
, the number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
criminalists
would increase
instead
of decrease. As a piece of evidence, according to global survey result more than 70% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
and adolescents commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
again after punished in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
prison.

In conclusion
, in fact, nowadays the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is improving among the youth generation than
Did you mean: "in the past"?
in past
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rehabilitate
them by giving impact through special punishes.
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IELTS essay Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
253 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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