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More and more people work from home and study from home with the development of computer technology. DO you think it is positive or negative development? v.1

More and more people work from home and study from home with the development of computer technology. DO you think it is positive or negative development? v. 1
It is an inevitable fact that there is an unceasing increase in the number of people working and studying at home with assistance of computer technology. From my perspective, it marks a beneficial development in our contemporary lives. First, no time is wasted commuting to workplace or schools, meaning that they can save a lot of money from traveling costs and also alleviate environmental problems. By slashing a large volume of traffic used on streets, exhaust fumes would be significantly cut down and concurrently gridlock would no longer exist. Moreover, while working and studying at home, residents will have flexible times. They just have to finish a certain amount of work at anytime within a day and then spend more time on playing with families and friends. Instead of doing from five-to-nine jobs, tele-workers can balance their work schedules and enjoy a more healthy life with the aid of computer technology. Second, advanced technology provides vast sources of information and applications that allow workers and students to reach their best performance from home. For example, various prestigious universities now present a wide range of online courses and simultaneously grant academic qualifications for students after finishing the courses. As a result, it opens limitless opportunities for students especially who are disabled or cannot attend classes to follow academic education. Also, employers estimate the performance of workers based on their productivity not their presence at the offices. With the help of technology including Microsoft Office or social communication via Skype or e-mail, employees completely can work at home without any difficulties. In conclusion, I opine that it is a positive trend for both workers and students with regard to working at home with the help of computer technology.
It is an inevitable fact that there is an unceasing increase in the number of
people
working and studying at home with assistance of computer
technology
. From my perspective, it marks a beneficial development in our contemporary
lives
.

First
, no time
is wasted
commuting to workplace or schools, meaning that they can save
a lot of
money from traveling costs and
also
alleviate environmental problems. By slashing a large volume of traffic
used
on streets, exhaust fumes would be
significantly
cut
down and
concurrently
gridlock would no longer exist.
Moreover
, while working and studying at home, residents will have flexible times. They
just
have to
finish a certain amount of work at anytime within a day and then spend more time on playing with families and friends.
Instead
of doing from five-to-nine jobs,
tele-workers
can balance their work schedules and enjoy a more healthy life with the aid of computer technology.

Second, advanced
technology
provides vast sources of information and applications that
allow
workers and
students
to reach their best performance from home.
For example
, various prestigious universities
now
present a wide range of online courses and
simultaneously
grant academic qualifications for
students
after finishing the courses.
As a result
, it opens limitless opportunities for
students
especially
who
are disabled
or cannot attend classes to follow academic education.
Also
, employers estimate the performance of workers based on their productivity not their presence at the offices. With the
help
of
technology
including Microsoft Office or social communication via Skype or e-mail, employees completely can work at home without any difficulties.

In conclusion
, I opine that it is a
positive
trend for both workers and
students
with regard to working at home with the
help
of computer
technology
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay More and more people work from home and study from home with the development of computer technology. DO you think it is positive or negative development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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