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More and more people are moving away from an agiculture background to relocate in cities to look for work. What will be the consequences of this? What solutions can you offer.

More and more people are moving away from an agiculture background to relocate in cities to look for work. What will be the consequences of this? What solutions can you offer. EywL
Agiculture plays crucial role in development and growth of economy. Nowadays, number of people are migrating to cities and towns for getting jobs. Although, farmers provide food to whole world but individual who already engaged in agriculture field do not want to do farming in future. There is plethora of reasons for this problem. Firstly, profit margin in farming is tends to decline day by day. Pesticides and machinary both are extremely expensive. Most of farmers cannot afford expensive machnies anymore. As a result, they are shifting to cities to find better life and to get job. Secondly, agriculture sector involves huge amount of risk. In other words, farming is a seasonal sector. Sometime farmers faced lose due to weather such as flood, drought. Whole life they lived with fear of losing crops. To find out fixed income source they are shifting their lives to cities. Migration of farmers to different sector directly effects whole economy. Countries will suffer from problem of scarcity of food due to lack of productivity of food items. To cope up with this problem government must import the eatable item that will leads to increase in price level. That will be worst time for people who are below poverty line. They will face situation of huger. Moreover, other people will try to out the alternative food that might be junk food that will affect their health. Nevertheless, these problems can be resolved by providing crop insurace to farmers. Government should take initiative to feel secure to farmer about their crops. If they have any assurance that will minimize the risk factor related to crops. They will never leave the agriculture sector. Apart from this, Higher authories should provide subsidies to farmers on pesticides and machines. It will be big relief for them to get machines at less price by subsidies. Lastly, this problem can be resolved by creating awareness among people about importace of agricuture, new technique and machince for farming. To conclude, shifting to cities for getting employment can be benifical for individual but agriculture sector will be suffered by this migration. Government and indiviual should put some combined efforts to deal with this problem.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Agiculture
plays crucial role in development and growth of economy. Nowadays, number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are migrating to cities and towns for getting jobs.

Although,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farmers
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
to whole world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
individual who already engaged in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agriculture
field do not want to
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "go farming".
do farming
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
. There is plethora of reasons for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
Firstly
, profit margin in farming is tends to decline day by day. Pesticides and
Possible spelling mistake found.
machinary
both are
extremely
expensive. Most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farmers
cannot afford expensive
Possible spelling mistake found.
machnies
anymore.
As a result
, they are shifting to cities to find better life and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
job.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agriculture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
involves huge amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
.
In other words
, farming is a seasonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
. Sometime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farmers
faced lose due to weather such as flood, drought. Whole life they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
with fear of losing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
. To find out
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
income source they are shifting their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
to cities.

Migration of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farmers
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
directly
effects whole economy. Countries will suffer from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
of scarcity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
due to lack of productivity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items. To cope up with this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
import the eatable item that will leads to increase in price level. That will be
A determiner is probably missing here: "the worst".
worst
time for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are below poverty line. They will face situation of huger.
Moreover
, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will try to out the alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
that might be junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
that will affect their health.

Nevertheless
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
can
be resolved
by providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crop
Possible spelling mistake found.
insurace
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farmers
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should take initiative to feel secure to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farmer
about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
they have any assurance that will minimize the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
factor related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crops
. They will never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agriculture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
. Apart from this, Higher
Possible spelling mistake found.
authories
should provide subsidies to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
farmers
on pesticides and machines. It will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
relief for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
machines at less price by subsidies.
Lastly
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
can
be resolved
by creating awareness among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about
Possible spelling mistake found.
importace
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
agricuture
, new technique and
Possible spelling mistake found.
machince
for farming.

To conclude
, shifting to cities for getting employment can be
Possible spelling mistake found.
benifical
for individual
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agriculture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
will
be suffered
by this migration.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
indiviual
should put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
combined efforts to deal with this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
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IELTS essay More and more people are moving away from an agiculture background to relocate in cities to look for work. What will be the consequences of this? What solutions can you offer.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
361 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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