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Mass tourism is one of the greatest sources of pollution. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement. Write an essay of at least 250 words to answer this.

Mass tourism is one of the greatest sources of pollution. with this statement. Write an essay of at least 250 words to answer this. kLGNW
Tourism is considered to be one of the most important industries in the world and it is the key factor contributing to the country’s economic development. However, it still has many negative impacts on the environment. Thus, I strongly agree with the idea that mass tourism is one of the most significant drivers of pollution. First of all, tourist behavior leads to detrimental environmental impacts. For tourists, because of people’s laziness and carelessness, tourist activity has negative environmental consequences. Tourists that are irresponsible typically litter the attractions they visit. Even the highest peak in the world, Mount Everest, is littered with human trash like oxygen cylinders, waste, and camping equipment. For aboriginal, everybody lives in the travel destination that wants business accommodation, hotel, or resort. This is the reason why many numerous hills and mountains were destroyed to build this one. The case of deforestation in Dak Nong to build a resort is a prime example of tourism facilities built for profit without regard to the natural features of that place, causing aesthetic pollution. Secondly, mass tourism leads to greater use of the transportation system and then, causes more air pollution. Thus, this transportation can cause more air pollution and noise pollution. Tourist vehicles are creating silent “beeps” at traffic congestion, as well as a toxic atmosphere usually appearing. Finally, sewage generated at tourist destinations is contaminating the natural environment. Water resources are excessively used for swimming pools, hotels, etc by tourists. These serious problems can lead to water shortages and degradation of water supplies, even if generating a greater amount of wastewater. In conclusion, while the tourist industry has good benefits for the economy, the negative repercussions are significantly more than money earned from this sector can offset. Hopefully, governments and inhabitants will be able to control the business by paying greater attention to all factors in order to get the best possible results.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourism
is considered
to be one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
industries in the world and it is the key factor contributing to the country’s economic development.
However
, it
still
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on the environment.
Thus
, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is one of the most significant drivers of pollution.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
behavior leads to detrimental environmental impacts. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s laziness and carelessness,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
activity has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
environmental consequences.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourists
that are irresponsible
typically
litter the attractions they visit. Even the highest peak in the world, Mount Everest,
is littered
with human trash like oxygen cylinders, waste, and camping equipment. For aboriginal, everybody
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in the travel destination that wants business accommodation, hotel, or resort. This is the reason why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
numerous hills and mountains were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
to build this one. The case of deforestation in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dak
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nong
to build a resort is a prime example of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
facilities built for profit without regard to the natural features of that place, causing aesthetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
.
Secondly
, mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
leads to greater
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of the transportation system and then, causes more air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
.
Thus
, this transportation can cause more air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and noise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Tourist
vehicles are creating silent “beeps” at traffic congestion,
as well
as a toxic atmosphere
usually
appearing.
Finally
, sewage generated at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
destinations is contaminating the natural environment. Water resources are
excessively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for swimming pools, hotels, etc by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
. These serious problems can lead to water shortages and degradation of water supplies, even if generating a greater amount of wastewater.

In conclusion
, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
industry has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
benefits for the economy, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
repercussions are
significantly
more than money earned from this sector can offset.
Hopefully
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and inhabitants will be able to control the business by paying greater attention to all factors in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the best possible results.

IELTS essay Mass tourism is one of the greatest sources of pollution. with this statement. Write an essay of at least 250 words to answer this.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
315 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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