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Many people thinks that the children who was grow with the money he or she has not any problems with the managing their money in the future.

Many people thinks that the children who was grow with the money he or she has not any problems with the managing their money in the future. ApqVe
Many people thinks that the children who was grow with the money he or she has not any problems with the managing their money in the future. I am agree with this opinion that spending time for this type of people is very easy. On the one hand, there are can be some problems with them that with spending their own moneys For example: if the kids consumption their's parents money they do not think about to economise their parent's money and they can use this money how much they want. It depends to how their parents notice to their children. If they keep notice very good to their children the kids can use their money very well. On the other hand, there are a lot of positive sides too that it can bring people to be a agree with this view. For example: when their parents give some aids to concentrate or spend their money and they should teach them to solve their problems and how to manage their not only money additionally their time too and in my view giving money from their childhood is the best way to teach for manage their money. To sum up, there are a lot of reasons that it can bring to agree or disagree views however in my view the parents should teach them money managing from their childhood and it is the best way for study kids in future.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
thinks
that the children who was
Consider using a past participle here: "grown".
grow
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
he or she has not any problems with the managing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in the future. I am
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion that spending time for this type of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easy.

On the one hand, there are can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems with them that with spending their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moneys
For example
: if the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "kids'" or "kid's"?
kids
consumption
Did you mean "their" or "theirs"?
their's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about to
Possible spelling mistake. 'economise' is British English.
economise
their parent's
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
money and
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
how much they want. It
The verb 'to depend' requires the preposition '(up)on': "depends on".
depends
to how their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
notice to their children.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
notice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to their children the kids can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides
Did you mean "to that"?
too that
it can bring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to be
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
view
.
For example
: when their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
aids to concentrate or spend their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
money and
they should teach them to solve their problems and how to manage their not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
additionally
their time too and in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
view
giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
from their childhood is the best way to teach for manage their money.

To sum up, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
reasons that it can bring to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
or disagree
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
views
however
in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
view
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should teach them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
managing from their childhood and it is the best way for study kids
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
.
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IELTS essay Many people thinks that the children who was grow with the money he or she has not any problems with the managing their money in the future.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
239 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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