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Many people think that more money will make them happier.How important is money for happiness?

Many people think that more money will make them happier. How important is money for happiness? mqRO
Most individuals are in a view that having abundant money leads to the happier lifestyle. This essay enlightens about the significance of money for happiness. To embark with, In cutting-edge technological world money plays a prominent role for every individual in different aspects of their life but having merely money doesnot lead to happiness. Firstly, holding large amount leads to rich life such as we can own costly car and can wear various designing dresses and show our richness to friends and family members. Secondly, money not only provide us certain amount of happiness but also increases respect in society. For instance, politicians who are rich will donate amount to the underprivileged people and for several orphanage homes this gives respect from public. On the other hand, happiness also play a vital role for our life having money alone doesnot provide happy. A part from money several factors can give recreation to the public the primary factor for happiness is leading a successful life and having a satisfaction job although with low remuneration this enhance the quality of life and long-term lifespan. The secondary reason is many people will see happiness from family relationships although they don't have a high amount. To illustrates, a family giving importance to ethics, Values and showing love towards each other gives a large amount of happiness. In conclusion, money is very essential for every individual although happiness plays a major role in every life.
Most individuals are in a view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
abundant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
leads to the happier lifestyle. This essay enlightens about the significance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
. To embark with, In cutting-edge technological world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
plays a prominent role for every individual in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
aspects of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
merely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
Possible spelling mistake found.
doesnot
lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
.
Firstly
, holding large
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amount
leads to rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
such as we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
costly car and can wear various designing dresses and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
our richness to friends and family members.
Secondly
,
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money
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
provide us certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
increases respect in society.
For instance
, politicians who are rich will donate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
to the underprivileged
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and for several orphanage homes this gives respect from public.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
also
play a vital role for our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
alone
Possible spelling mistake found.
doesnot
provide happy. A part from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
several factors can give recreation to the public the primary factor for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is leading a successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a satisfaction job although with low remuneration
The verb 'enhance' is plural. Did you mean: "this enhances"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
this enhance
the quality of
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life
and long-term lifespan. The secondary reason is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
from family relationships although they don't have a high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
. To illustrates, a family giving importance to ethics, Values and showing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
towards each other gives a large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
.
In conclusion
,
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money
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential for every individual although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
plays a major role in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
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IELTS essay Many people think that more money will make them happier. How important is money for happiness?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
240 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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