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School should prepare pupils for their future lives and for the world of employment. Learning about history is not necessary and more emphasis should be places other school subjects.

School should prepare pupils for their future lives and for the world of employment. Learning about history is not necessary and more emphasis should be places other school subjects. BKja
There is no denying that school students are prepared for their future lives by schools and for the world of work. However, teaching about history is not significant and more consideration should be placed on. I don't completely agree with the given viewpoint. In this following essay I am going to disclose my own opinions based on my own knowledge. To start with, history has a crucial role in our social lifestyle and everybody lives with their history. There are more historical facts about the inhabitants of the world and everyone must aware of this. In my honesty opinion history is more interesting than other kind of subjects, because you can find many interesting facts about something related to the past. Likewise, it is claimed that history is notion of the country and some countries proud of from their histories because there are many famous people lived in the past. Afterwards, there are different opinions for this situation. Many teachers want to prepare children for life of the future and want to work in the companies which have high status. However, to my mind, children must prepare themselves for their next period of the life not only consideration for future but also self-employment has also important for young generations. Taking one instance, after world war 2 more countries consider for youngers because they believe that only children can afford change the world in good condition. Come to conclusion, both teachers and parents must prepare pupils for the future life. If they teach young generations strongly, they will live in a good condition which they want because of children behavior.
There is no denying that school students
are prepared
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
by schools and for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
of work.
However
, teaching about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is not significant and more consideration should
be placed
on. I don't completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
viewpoint. In this following essay I am going to disclose my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinions based on my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
knowledge.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
has a crucial role in our social lifestyle and everybody
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. There are more historical facts about the inhabitants of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
and everyone
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
must aware
of this. In my honesty opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is more interesting than other kind of subjects,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
you can find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
interesting facts about something related to the past.
Likewise
, it
is claimed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is notion of the country and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries proud of from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
histories
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in the past.

Afterwards, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions for this situation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
teachers want to prepare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
for life of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
and want to work in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
which have high status.
However
, to my mind,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
prepare themselves for their
next
period of the life not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
consideration for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
self-employment has
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for young generations. Taking one instance, after
Capitalize specific historic events, episodes, and eras.
world war 2
more countries consider for
Possible spelling mistake found.
youngers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can afford
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
condition.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Come
to conclusion, both teachers and parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
prepare pupils for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
life. If they teach young generations
strongly
, they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
condition which they want
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
behavior.
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IELTS essay School should prepare pupils for their future lives and for the world of employment. Learning about history is not necessary and more emphasis should be places other school subjects.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
269 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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