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Many people living in cities these days do not get enough physical exercise. What are the causes of this? What are some possible solutions?

Many people living in cities these days do not get enough physical exercise. What are the causes of this? What are some possible solutions? py63
Nowadays, a large number of individuals who reside in urban areas lack an adequate amount of exercise. This essay will outline that the sedentary lifestyle and the hectic work hours are the major factors underlying the problem, and submit a government-sponsored awareness compaign and a flexible work schedule as two viable solutions. City dwellers often struggle to get enough physical exercise as their jobs discourage an active lifestyle and leave no room on the schedule for them to work out. With the advancement of technologies, desk jobs promote the use of eletronic devices and a sedentary lifestyle. Software developers, for instance, tend to spend the majority of a day sitting in front of a computer and rarely need to move elsewhere. What is worse, individuals have to work overtime reguarly. The resultant hectic schedule leaves little free time for jaded employees to get an adequate amount of exercise. As such, it is evident that the busy nature of modern jobs and the sedantary lifestyle they promote contribute to the lack of exercise among the society. There are a few remedial actions that can be taken to alleviate the issue, namely an awareness compagin sponsored by the government and flexiable work schedules supported by the companies. The government should take the lead in educating people and advocating an active lifestyle. An advertising compagin, for example, is an effective way to show the significance of physical exercise and how the lack of it can negatively affect one's wellbeing. Meanwhile, the corporations need to step in and allow a flexible work schedule. Take remote work for example, it enbales individuals to allocate their time freely and thus leaving room for them to get exercises done. In summary, the lack of physical exercise is of concern to the general public. This essay introduced that the sedentary lifestyle and busy work schedule are the main contributors. The suggested actions are an educational compaign sponsored by the government and flexiable work programs made by the companies.
Nowadays,
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
individuals who reside in urban areas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lack
an adequate amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. This essay will outline that the sedentary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
and the hectic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
hours are the major factors underlying the problem, and submit a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
-sponsored awareness
Possible spelling mistake found.
compaign
and a flexible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schedule
as two viable solutions.

City dwellers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
struggle to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
as their jobs discourage an active
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
no room on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schedule
for them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
out. With the advancement of technologies, desk jobs promote the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
eletronic
devices and a sedentary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
. Software developers,
for instance
, tend to spend the majority of a day sitting in front of a computer and rarely need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
elsewhere. What is worse, individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
overtime
Possible spelling mistake found.
reguarly
. The resultant hectic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schedule
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
free time for jaded employees to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an adequate amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. As such, it is evident that the busy nature of modern jobs and the
Possible spelling mistake found.
sedantary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
they promote contribute to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lack
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
among the society.

There are a few remedial actions that can
be taken
to alleviate the issue,
namely
an awareness
Possible spelling mistake found.
compagin
sponsored by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
flexiable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schedules
supported by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should take the lead in educating
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and advocating an active
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
. An advertising
Possible spelling mistake found.
compagin
,
for example
, is an effective way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the significance of physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
and how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lack
of it can
negatively
affect one's
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
. Meanwhile, the corporations need to step in and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
a flexible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schedule
. Take remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for example
, it
Possible spelling mistake found.
enbales
individuals to allocate their time
freely
and
thus
leaving room for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercises
done.

In summary, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lack
of physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
is of concern to the
Consider using "public".
general public
. This essay introduced that the sedentary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
and busy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schedule
are the main contributors. The suggested actions are an educational
Possible spelling mistake found.
compaign
sponsored by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
flexiable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
programs made by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.
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IELTS essay Many people living in cities these days do not get enough physical exercise. What are the causes of this? What are some possible solutions?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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