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Many people live in the city. What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in the city?

Many people live in the city. What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in the city? 5apeP
There are many debates surrounding living in the city. From my perspective, this tendency has both benefits and drawbakcs. On the one hand, the advantages can be listed out a lot such as many job opportunities and good facilities. Firstly, because of many large companies and corporations that need a large number of human resources. There are many foreign companies based in Vietnam that have been recruiting talented people. As a result, creating jobs for many people. Futhermore, due to an abundant source of income and human resources, many facilities are also being improved and built. For instance, many high-rise buildings and roads are built to serve the needs of people. Finally create a solid and developed city system. On the other hand, the disadvantages also have no less, pollution is always a burning problem, in the city there is also environmental pollution and noise pollution. More companies also mean more untreated wastewater is dumped into the river. This work affects the daily life and health of people living around. In spite of noise pollution is not an issue that many people care about, it is produced daily and in abundance in cities. For example, noise from traffic jams and construction works can easily lead to fatigue and stress. In conclusion, the benefits of living in the city are job opportunities and good facilities, such as the negative effect on environment also harmful health. Overall, the job opportunities and good facilities benefits outweigh the disadvantages of living in the city because with the continuous development of people and society it will be a big failure if you do not live in the city.
There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
debates surrounding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the city. From my perspective, this tendency has both benefits and
Possible spelling mistake found.
drawbakcs
.

On the one hand, the advantages can
be listed
out a lot such as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
facilities.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
large
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and corporations that need
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
human resources. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
foreign
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
based in Vietnam that have been recruiting talented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
As a result
, creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Futhermore
, due to an abundant source of income and human resources,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
facilities are
also
being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
and built.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
high-rise buildings and roads
are built
to serve the needs of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
create a solid and developed city system.

On the other hand
, the disadvantages
also
have no less,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
is always a burning problem, in the city there is
also
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and noise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
. More
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
also
mean more untreated wastewater
is dumped
into the river. This work affects the daily life and health of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
around.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
noise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
is not an issue that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
care about, it
is produced
daily and in abundance in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
For example
, noise from traffic jams and construction works can
easily
lead to fatigue and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.

In conclusion
, the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the city are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
facilities, such as the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on environment
also
harmful health.
Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
facilities benefits outweigh the disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the city
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
with the continuous development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and society it will be a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
failure if you do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the city.
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IELTS essay Many people live in the city. What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in the city?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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