Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Many people believe that zoos have no purpose in today’s world and should be closed.What problems do zoos bring? What are the alternatives to zoos if they are closed?

Many people believe that zoos have no purpose in today’s world and should be closed. What problems do zoos bring? What are the alternatives to zoos if they are closed? xX2a
Zoos have animals which are from various parts of the world. Plethora of people think that zoos should be closed since they think animals should be kept free out of the cage. This essay will discuss problems of zoos and its solution if it is closed. Firstly, It explains disadvantages of zoos. People are in loss who will miss face to face attraction of animals of zoos also they miss live knowledge about the animals habitat and its routine life from the guide. In addition Government will be in loss as they will not get ticket fair if it is closed. Thus, government may not get any donors who support financially to over come issues such as water shortage in zoos or any help regarding the food varities of animals. In contrast, there are many solutions if zoos animals are kept free in natural environment and they might be trasferred to the natural sanctuaries or any conservative area where they feel safe and protected from the predators such as any animal or any cruel person who come to kill them for various reasons. Further more childrens who are interested about wildlife of different creatures, they can watch TV channels such as, the National Geography, the Animal Planet and so on. Thus they have many options instead of zoos. In conclusion, the animals who are locked up in zoos show interference in the environment by people so they should be released in the natural habitats. Because it servers no value in current time. In addition, there are different types of solutions to zoos animals. I recommend to start many channels regarding animals habitat and its culture for children and people who are keen to enhance their knowledge.
Zoos have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
which are from various parts of the world. Plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that zoos should
be closed
since they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
free out of the cage. This essay will discuss problems of zoos and its solution if it
is closed
.

Firstly
, It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
disadvantages of zoos.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are in loss
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
will miss face to face attraction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
of zoos
also
they miss
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
knowledge about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
habitat and its routine life from the guide. In
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
addition
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
will be in loss as they will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
ticket
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
if it
is closed
.
Thus
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
may not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
any donors
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
support
financially
to over
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
issues such as water shortage in zoos or any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
regarding the food
Possible spelling mistake found.
varities
of animals.

In contrast
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
solutions if zoos
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
free in natural
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
environment and
they might be
Possible spelling mistake found.
trasferred
to the natural sanctuaries or any conservative area where they feel safe and protected from the predators such as any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
or any cruel person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to kill them for various reasons.
Further
more
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are interested
about wildlife of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
creatures, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
TV channels such as, the National Geography, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Animal
Planet and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
options
instead
of zoos.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are locked
up in zoos
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
interference in the environment by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they should
be released
in the natural habitats.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'it'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
it servers
no value in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
time.
In addition
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of solutions to zoos
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. I recommend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
channels regarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
habitat and its culture for children and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are keen to enhance their knowledge.

IELTS essay Many people believe that zoos have no purpose in today’s world and should be closed. What problems do zoos bring? What are the alternatives to zoos if they are closed?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Many people believe that zoos have no purpose in today’s world and should be closed.What problems do zoos bring? What are the alternatives to zoos if they are closed?