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Many parents today do not spend much time with their children. Why is this does this affect parents or children more?

Many parents today do not spend much time with their children. Why is this does this affect parents or children more? gQ71
Many parents today do not spend much time with their children. Why is this does this affect parents or children more, and number of parents don't have close bond with their children, and don't allocate a time to work at their relationship. In my view, there are two major, major seasons for this fair sleep. The parents, spend a considerable proportion of time working outside. And then, after a working day, they arrive who is full of tiredness, also the children pastor time lonely. So they are likely to break down a relationship. And specially adolescence children are likely to have a lot of conflict with their family. Parents should mind their time and do spend time with their children. Secondly, dysfunctional family may be facing this murghab problem. For instance, And estranged parents who have difficult relationship with themselves, or may eventually decide to get a divorce in some case, it can be argued menace. Divorce, Divorce, they don't have enough time to a successful relationship with their child sable family can help to cement their relationship, and other points. Trials may be making false friends. This situation is very harmful for them. To conclude with the arguments given above, I firmly believe that parents should pay attention to their children, because this issue has a bad effect on children, and consequently this influences their parents relationship.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
do not spend much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Why is this does this affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
more, and number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
don't have close
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "bonded".
bond
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, and don't allocate a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to work at their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
. In my view, there are two major, major seasons for this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
sleep. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, spend a considerable proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
working outside. And then, after a working day, they arrive who is full of tiredness,
also
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
pastor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
lonely.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they are likely to break down a relationship.

And
specially
adolescence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are likely to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
conflict with their family.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
should mind their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and do spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their children.

Secondly
, dysfunctional family may be facing this
Possible spelling mistake found.
murghab
problem.
For instance
, And estranged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
who have difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
with themselves, or may
eventually
decide to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a divorce in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
case, it can
be argued
menace. Divorce, Divorce, they don't have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to a successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
with their child sable family can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to cement their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
, and other points.

Trials may be making false friends. This situation is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
harmful for them.

To conclude
with the arguments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
above, I
firmly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should pay attention to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this issue has a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, and
consequently
this influences their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
.
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IELTS essay Many parents today do not spend much time with their children. Why is this does this affect parents or children more?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
228 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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