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Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem? v.10

Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem? v. 10
There is no doubt the fact that a dramatic rise in crime rate, especially from ex-cons throughout the last decade has become a heated topic of the whole society. The questions arise are what the main causes are and are there any possible solutions to this problem. The following paragraphs will discuss 2 major reasons along with 2 effective measures for this concerning matter. More specifically, being isolated and unemployment can be reckoned as 2 crucial reasons of the problem. When it comes to isolation, it is obvious that several offenders despite being released from prisons still get treated as criminals, which can lead to the feeling of isolation. Ex-prisoners, therefore, become frustrated and commit crimes again. Moreover, offenders do not always get sympathized from employers, so they end up being unemployed. They struggle financially and get back the old track to earn a living, consequently. On the other hands, regarding solutions, raising awareness and organizing clubs are two most fruitful. First, in terms of consciousness, government should encourage other citizens to socialize with ex-cons rather than avoiding them through meetings, lessons, oral methods. Vietnam local authorities usually hold year end meetings to re-introduce offenders to the public for sympathy and more job opportunities, for instance. Second, creating clubs for ex-prisoners to have a good term, share feelings and heal together. With that in mind, those clubs can prevent ex-cons from isolation In a nutshell, majority of re-offenders are caused by being isolated and unemployed. To tackle that severe problem, raise awareness utilized with organizing clubs are two most useful solutions.
There is no doubt the fact that a dramatic rise in crime rate,
especially
from ex-cons throughout the last decade has become a heated topic of the whole society. The questions arise are what the main causes are and are there any possible solutions to this problem. The following paragraphs will discuss 2 major reasons along with 2 effective measures for this concerning matter.

More
specifically
,
being isolated
and unemployment can
be reckoned
as 2 crucial reasons of the problem. When it
comes
to isolation, it is obvious that several offenders despite
being released
from prisons
still
get
treated as criminals, which can lead to the feeling of isolation. Ex-prisoners,
therefore
, become frustrated and commit crimes again.
Moreover
, offenders do not always
get
sympathized from employers,
so
they
end
up
being unemployed
. They struggle
financially
and
get
back the
old
track
to earn a living,
consequently
.

On the other hands, regarding solutions, raising awareness and organizing
clubs
are two most fruitful.
First
, in terms of consciousness,
government
should encourage other citizens to socialize with ex-cons
rather
than avoiding them through meetings, lessons, oral methods. Vietnam local authorities
usually
hold year
end
meetings to re-introduce offenders to the public for sympathy and more job opportunities,
for instance
. Second, creating
clubs
for ex-prisoners to have a
good
term, share feelings and heal together. With that in mind, those
clubs
can
prevent
ex-cons from isolation

In a nutshell, majority of re-offenders
are caused
by
being isolated
and unemployed. To tackle that severe problem, raise awareness utilized with organizing
clubs
are two most useful solutions.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem? v. 10

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
261 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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