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Many of the world's cities are currently facing a serious housing shortage. What are some of the reasons for this shortage and what solutions can you suggest?

In manifold countries at contemporary they are facing a serious shortage of land for dwelling mostly in ubran areas through out the world. It has a myriad of factors for this Shortage and remedy for suggestion. Therefore, I could propound and expound on this topic to deliver my views. Firstly, population explosition was the primary culprit for the cause of housing shortage. Further, legion of people were leaving their native place in rural areas and settling in cities due to attracted by sophisticated life. Moreover, in cities have a plethora of opportunities for education, employment, security, utilities and other resources. To illustrate this, In Hyderabad, India 10 crores of people live over there, an account of high industrialisation and huge Job opportunities and it is a cosmopolitian city. Due to this, finding a land became a great task for the people. In addition, university Education is supremely demanding. Therefore, students from diverse places admiting them in cities for university education. Secondly, Industries like paper, steel etc should be erected in countryside because they cause severe pollution and in countryside the avilability of land is huge. Indeed, instead of constructing individual houses, apartment is the great step. So, that a lot of families can live over there. For Example, in flats likely not availabity of land for residence. In fact, government should also take primitive measures to enhance this problem. They should provide electricity, roads, education, utilities, securities and job opportunities part from cities. However, by this facilities people stay happilily in their origin place without any suffacations. In the nutshell, the aforementioned views are appropiate. In fact, cities provide various gains in ensemble ways and it is prominent to the authority to take steps to solve this problem. It is rudimentary task to the bureaucraft to tackle this if not it is commendable and leads to disastrous.
In manifold countries at contemporary they are facing a serious shortage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
for dwelling
mostly
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
ubran
areas
Did you mean “throughout”?
through out
the world. It has a myriad of factors for this Shortage and remedy for suggestion.
Therefore
, I could propound and expound on this topic to deliver my views.

Firstly
, population
Possible spelling mistake found.
explosition
was the primary culprit for the cause of housing shortage.
Further
, legion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were leaving their native place in rural areas and settling in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
due to attracted by sophisticated life.
Moreover
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
have a plethora of opportunities for education, employment, security, utilities and other resources. To illustrate this, In Hyderabad, India 10 crores of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
over there, an account of high
Possible spelling mistake. ‘industrialisation’ is British English.
industrialisation
and huge Job
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
opportunities and
it is a
Possible spelling mistake found.
cosmopolitian
city. Due to this, finding a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
became a great task for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
In addition
, university Education is
supremely
demanding.
Therefore
, students from diverse places
Possible spelling mistake found.
admiting
them in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
for university education.

Secondly
, Industries like paper, steel etc should
be erected
in countryside
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they cause severe pollution and in countryside the
Possible spelling mistake found.
avilability
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
is huge.
Indeed
,
instead
of constructing individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
, apartment is the great step.
“So , that” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
So, that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
families can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
over there.
For Example
, in flats likely not
Possible spelling mistake found.
availabity
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
for residence. In fact,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
also
take primitive measures to enhance this problem. They should provide electricity, roads, education, utilities, securities and job opportunities part from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
However
, by this facilities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
stay
Possible spelling mistake found.
happilily
in their origin place without any
Possible spelling mistake found.
suffacations
.

In the nutshell, the aforementioned views are
Possible spelling mistake found.
appropiate
. In fact,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
provide various gains in ensemble
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
ways and
it is prominent to the authority to take steps to solve this problem. It is rudimentary task to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
bureaucraft
to tackle this if not it is commendable and leads to disastrous.
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IELTS essay Many of the world's cities are currently facing a serious housing shortage. What are some of the reasons for this shortage and what solutions can you suggest?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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