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Many famous sports players advertise products. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

Many famous sports players advertise products. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? 8QaxV
It is an irrefutable fact that, in modern era, eminent sports player are advertising the equipment which are related to their sports. The merits of this trend in sale new products. However, there are a plethora of demerits loss of focus and become money minded. This essay will discuss the pros and cons of this trend discuss in upcoming paragraphs. To begin with, many big company hire a famous person to advert their products which is led to sales. Moreover, people known about this for watching TV and social media. For example sales of men facewash increased by virat kohli. Therefore, the growth of products indirectly rely on well known person. On the other hand, if they do marketing their all focus on it, they will loss their concerntration in the game. so, their performance will be not good as compared to earlier. Furthermore, althlets become a money minded if they do a advertising. The result of this, they away from their game. In conclusion, there is no doubt that popular player are doing adverts and this phenomenon has some drawbacks and benefits which are given in the above paragraphs. players should be focus on their first job as compared to other.
It is an irrefutable fact that, in modern era, eminent sports player are advertising the equipment which
are related
to their sports. The merits of this trend in sale new products.
However
, there are a plethora of demerits loss of focus and become money minded. This essay will discuss the pros and cons of this trend discuss in upcoming paragraphs. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
hire a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
person to advert their products which
is led
to sales.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
known about this for watching TV and social media.
For example
sales of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
Possible spelling mistake found.
facewash
increased by
Possible spelling mistake found.
virat
Possible spelling mistake found.
kohli
.
Therefore
, the growth of products
indirectly
rely on well known person.
On the other hand
, if they do marketing their all focus on it, they will
"loss" is a noun. Did you mean the verb "lose" (= 'to lose')?
loss
their
Possible spelling mistake found.
concerntration
in the game.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
, their performance will be not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
as compared to earlier.
Furthermore
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
althlets
become
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "money".
a money
minded if they do
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
advertising. The result of this, they away from their game.
In conclusion
, there is no doubt that popular player are doing adverts and this phenomenon has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks and benefits which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
in the above paragraphs.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
players
should be focus on their
first
job as compared to other.
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IELTS essay Many famous sports players advertise products. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
202 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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