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Many educational institutions give greater importance to subjects related to science and ignore subjects such as drama and literature. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

In many educational systems, science is considered more important than literature and drama. This attitude drives mainly from the impact of science on humans’ lives. In my opinion, although science has led to many advancements, it should not be overvalued to cast a shadow over other art-related subjects which have always had an important role in people’s personality and emotions and ignoring these subjects would have negative consequences in peoples’ inner life. During past few decades, improvement in science has brought many advantages for mankind. It ranges from medical advancements to technological growth which all and all have made our lives healthier and easier. Many diseases once seemed incurable can simply be cured by taking medicine which has created based on scientific researches. Also, technology has favored us in many ways. For example, online communications with people who are thousands kilometer away have all been possible by the emergence of technology. Moreover, many physical demanding jobs are now done by machines or robots which have developed by advancement in engineering science. By taking all these benefits into consideration, it is reasonable that importance of science has increased. However, it is not justifiable that other art-related subjects are of less importance and all the attentions should be allocated to merely science. Some subjects like literature and drama are intertwined with humans’ emotion. In this time that technology and machinery life style has dominated us; we need art-related subjects more than any time to meet our soul and emotions’ needs. Because these subjects give us a chance to get rid of a fast-pace life and reflect on our life. Besides, by drama and literature people can gain valuable experiences of different lives and learn positive behavioral models by which they would be able to grow their personality. For example, understanding characters and roles through a drama allows people to relate better to different situations and they would be provided with an insight into their own problems to take a suitable approach towards them. So, if educational institutions turn their attentions to science only, after a while drama and literature would disappear and leave people in their own hectic life in which they will be far away from true values. To conclude, science has affected our lives positively and that is why it has been considered very important. However, subjects like literature and drama should not be disregarded because they hold a prominent role in human beings’ emotional and personal growth and without emotions we would live a machinery life filled with tension.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
educational systems,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
is considered
more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drama
. This attitude drives
mainly
from the impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
on humans’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. In my opinion, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
has led to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advancements, it should not
be overvalued
to cast a shadow over other art-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
which have always had an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
personality and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotions
and ignoring these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
would have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples’
inner life.

During past few decades, improvement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
has brought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages for mankind. It ranges from medical advancements to technological growth which
This phrase is nonstandard. Did you mean “all in all” (=after all, nevertheless)?
all and all
have made our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
healthier and easier.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
diseases once seemed incurable can
simply
be cured
by taking medicine which has created based on scientific researches.
Also
, technology has favored us in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways.
For example
, online communications with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are thousands kilometer away have all been possible by the emergence of technology.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
physical demanding jobs are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
done by machines or robots which have developed by advancement in engineering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
. By taking all these benefits into consideration, it is reasonable that importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
has increased.

However
, it is not justifiable that other art-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are of less importance and all the attentions should
be allocated
to
merely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drama
are intertwined
with humans’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotion
. In this time that technology and machinery
This noun is normally spelled as one word.
life style
has dominated us; we need art-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
more than any time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
our soul and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotions’
needs.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
give us a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-pace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and reflect on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Besides
, by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drama
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can gain valuable experiences of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
and learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
behavioral models by which they would be able to grow their personality.
For example
, understanding characters and roles through a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drama
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to relate better to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
situations and
they would
be provided
with an insight into their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
problems to take a suitable approach towards them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, if educational institutions turn their attentions to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
, after a while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drama
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
would disappear and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
hectic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in which they will be far away from true values.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
positively
and
that is
why it has
been considered
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drama
should not
be disregarded
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they hold a prominent role in human beings’ emotional and personal growth and without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emotions
we would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
a machinery
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
filled with tension.
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IELTS essay Many educational institutions give greater importance to subjects related to science and ignore subjects such as drama and literature. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
420 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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