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Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative effect on the environment, eating habits, and families. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative effect on the environment, eating habits, and families. G958e
Fast food industries are having deteriorating effects on the environment and eating habits of individuals, However, there are two sides to a coin, we are going to discuss both the pros and cons of the instant food factory. Firstly, quick-lunch counters are usually preferred for their very low stand by time, as people are having hectic calendar all the day eventually, they favor foods which are quick and instant and in addition to that those kinds of foods are always celebrated by our taste buds due to their excess ingredients and appetizing look. For instance, there was a survey which proves that 80 percent of people often choose fast foods to home-made foods and one of the main reasons which are stated by the people, is the less waiting time and taste consequently, it helps them to be ahead of their school and work schedule by reducing the duration of their meal-break. Secondly, some of the vital reasons for all the health-related issues in young people is because of the food habit they are having. Although, ready-made foods take less time to consume it has their own problem-causing agents. Most people are being diagnosed with heart-related problems is because of what they eat and due to lack of exercise. To illustrate, Hospital surveys taken by WHO states that “Majority who are affected by gastro and heard related problems are people who eat 2/3 meals of the day in restaurants”, which in turn, creates an imbalance in the mental and physical health of the family and society. A plethora of canned foods are made in the industries which are letting out wastewater which pollutes the underground water wealth of the place. To conclude, Processed/canned or fast foods can’t be eradicated completely and government plays an important role in creating awareness amongst people about healthy food habits and everyone has their own responsibility to look after their fitness and body.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
industries are having deteriorating effects on the environment and eating habits of individuals,
However
, there are two sides to a coin, we are going to discuss both the pros and cons of the instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
factory.

Firstly
, quick-lunch counters are
usually
preferred for their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low stand by time, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are having hectic calendar all the day
eventually
, they favor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
which are quick and instant and
in addition
to that those kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are always celebrated by our taste buds due to their excess ingredients and appetizing look.
For instance
, there was a survey which proves that 80 percent of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
choose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
to home-made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and one of the main reasons which
are stated
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, is the less waiting time and taste
consequently
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to be ahead of their school and work schedule by reducing the duration of their meal-break.

Secondly
,
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
vital reasons for all the health-related issues in young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
habit they are having. Although, ready-made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
take less time to consume it has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
problem-causing agents. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
being diagnosed
with heart-related problems is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of what they eat and due to lack of exercise. To illustrate, Hospital surveys taken by WHO states that “Majority who are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
gastro
and heard related problems are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who eat 2/3 meals of the day in restaurants”, which in turn, creates an imbalance in the mental and physical health of the family and society. A plethora of canned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are made
in the industries which are letting out wastewater which pollutes the underground water wealth of the place.

To conclude
, Processed/canned or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
can’t
be eradicated
completely and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in creating awareness amongst
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
habits and everyone has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
responsibility to look after their fitness and body.
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IELTS essay Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative effect on the environment, eating habits, and families.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
318 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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