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Many animals are endangered. Some people argue that we should only protect animals that are useful to human. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many animals are endangered. Some people argue that we should only protect animals that are useful to human. rdql
There are an increasing number of animals living on the edge of extinction. It is argued that only those that are useful to human beings deserve to be protected. I disagree with the view. Admittedly, it seems to be more cost-effective to only make an effort to protect the animals that can be utilized by human beings. Firstly, there still exist a huge number of tough problems, such as famines and wars, waiting to be solved in many aspects of human beings’ society. Only spending money on animals whose meat can be eaten or fur can be made into clothes enables human beings to save resources for the solution of other problems. Secondly, the dying out of animals is not caused only by human beings. That being said, the disappearance of many species should actually be attributed to the choice of nature. Trying to protect those that are becoming extinct because they cannot adjust to the natural environment would be a waste of effort. However, I strongly believe that the protection of animals should not be done selectively. In the first place, most of the animals are crucial parts of the ecological system. Even those that look useless to human beings may be pivotal to the food of chains. If humans just sit by and watch a species disappear, it may significantly affect the ecology and even be detrimental to human beings. In the second place, the activities of human beings, such as hunting, medical experiments or urbanization, contribute to the deterioration of the survival of many animals. Therefore, human beings, after having gained vast benefits from nature, should shoulder the responsibility and answer for what we have done to the animals by protecting all animals that face the danger of dying out. In conclusion, though protecting animals selectively can save some money and energy, human beings should look at the larger picture, as protecting all endangered animals is not only protecting human beings ourselves, but also a responsibility of human beings’ society.
There are an increasing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
living on the edge of extinction. It
is argued
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
those that are useful to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings deserve to
be protected
. I disagree with the view.

Admittedly
, it seems to be more cost-effective to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an effort to protect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
that can
be utilized
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings.
Firstly
, there
still
exist a huge number of tough problems, such as famines and wars, waiting to
be solved
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings’ society.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Only
spending money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
whose meat can
be eaten
or fur can
be made
into clothes enables
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings to save resources for the solution of other problems.
Secondly
, the dying out of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is not caused
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings. That
being said
, the disappearance of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
species should actually
be attributed
to the choice of nature. Trying to protect those that are becoming extinct
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they cannot adjust to the natural environment would be a waste of effort.

However
, I
strongly
believe that the protection of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should not
be done
selectively
. In the
first
place, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are crucial parts of the ecological system. Even those that look useless to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings may be pivotal to the food of chains. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
sit by and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
a species disappear, it may
significantly
affect the ecology and even be detrimental to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings. In the second place, the activities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings, such as hunting, medical experiments or urbanization, contribute to the deterioration of the survival of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings, after having gained vast benefits from nature, should shoulder the responsibility and answer for what we have done to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protecting
all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
that face the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of dying out.

In conclusion
, though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
selectively
can save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money and energy,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings should look at the larger picture, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protecting
all endangered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings ourselves,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
a responsibility of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings’ society.
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IELTS essay Many animals are endangered. Some people argue that we should only protect animals that are useful to human.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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