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llliivng in big city advantages and why

llliivng in big city advantages and why bxVaY
Living in a small town is becoming more popular among middle aged people day by day. Considering a small town’s calmness, that’s an alluring idea. However, living in a big city has a lot of advantages over small towns. Firstly, when you live in big city, you can access any cultural or entertaining activities whenever you want such as theatre, opera and movie festivals. So you can use your leisure time doing activities that improve your cultural knowledge. Secondly, possibility of meeting with new people is increase due to the city population. For this reason, you may see different mindsets from different people. By doing so, you can learn many things, even about yourself. Even if you don’t like it, it stays in your life as an experience. Besides the social advantages, there are also many educational and employment opportunities in urban areas, especially for college students. College students who live in the big cities are able to be an intern in major companies while they are continuing their college life. By doing so, they will have a great chance to become stable worker of that company. In conclusion, you can live a calm and carefree life in small towns but then you will miss the advantages of big cities. For middle aged people it may not be that important if we consider they already have a regular life because of working schedule but for college students there are lots of missed opportunity
Living in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
town is becoming more popular among
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
middle aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
day by day. Considering a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
town’s calmness, that’s an alluring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
However
, living in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
advantages over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
towns.

Firstly
, when you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city, you can access any cultural or entertaining activities whenever you want such as
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
, opera and movie festivals.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
your leisure time doing activities that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
your cultural knowledge.
Secondly
, possibility of meeting with new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
increase due to the city population.
For this reason
, you may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
mindsets from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. By doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, you can learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things, even about yourself. Even if you don’t like it, it stays in your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as an experience.

Besides
the social advantages, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
educational and employment opportunities in urban areas,
especially
for college students. College students who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are able to be an intern in major
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
while they are continuing their college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. By doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they will have a great chance to become stable worker of that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

In conclusion
, you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a calm and carefree
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
towns
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
then you will miss the advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. For
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
middle aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
it may not be that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
if we consider they already have a regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of working schedule
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for college students there are lots of missed
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
opportunity
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IELTS essay llliivng in big city advantages and why

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
242 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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