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Life in a big city is good. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Life in a big city is good. with this opinion? GW37x
It is often said that a big city presents us with a variety of tremendous benefits that can help us lead a modern and convenient life. In my opinion, I completely agree with this idea. To begin with, big developments are city-centric, making city living more advantageous. The government is constantly concerned with the fundamental needs of city people, and they benefit from improved transportation, medical and recreational facilities, water and energy supplies, which are not readily accessible in rural regions. Malls and supermarkets, for example, all stay under one roof where people may go there on weekends to make important purchases and have fun. Furthermore, cities have more career prospects, and making a living in a developed metropolis is simpler. Not only do literate and well-qualified people have more options to work in multinational and large corporations, but many illiterate people work as security guards, car drivers, chefs, and helpers in city homes, stores, and offices. Finally, education in a big city has many more conveniences and advantages, especially in English and IT. To catch the tendency of international integration, parents teach their children when they are young to help them have both the native accent and good listening skills. They hire private tutors to teach their children bilingual languages, which also stimulates their children’s brains to be quicker. Living in a big city means that children may have more opportunities to meet and make small talk with foreigners from all over the world. Besides, focusing on IT is so essential for future jobs, and in the countryside, not all families have their computers to assist children to get acquainted with the technology. In summary, while I accept that life in a big city may have its dangers, I still believe the benefits of it outweigh the drawbacks.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
said that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city presents us with a variety of tremendous benefits that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us lead a modern and convenient life. In my opinion, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
developments are city-centric, making city living more advantageous. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is
constantly
concerned with the fundamental needs of city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, and they benefit from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
transportation, medical and recreational facilities, water and energy supplies, which are not
readily
accessible in rural regions. Malls and supermarkets,
for example
, all stay under one roof where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may go there on weekends to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchases
and have fun.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
have more career prospects, and making a living in a developed metropolis is simpler. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do literate and well-qualified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have more options to work in multinational and large corporations,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
illiterate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
work as security guards, car drivers, chefs, and helpers in city homes, stores, and offices.
Finally
, education in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more conveniences and advantages,
especially
in English and IT. To catch the tendency of international integration, parents teach their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
when they are young to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them have both the native accent and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
listening
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. They hire private tutors to teach their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
bilingual languages, which
also
stimulates their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
brains to be quicker. Living in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
may have more opportunities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
talk with foreigners from all over the world.
Besides
, focusing on IT is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
essential for future jobs, and in the countryside, not all families have their computers to assist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
acquainted with the technology. In summary, while I accept that life in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
big
city may have its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
, I
still
believe the benefits of it outweigh the drawbacks.
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IELTS essay Life in a big city is good. with this opinion?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
299 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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