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level of happiness and the factors related to happiness

level of happiness and the factors related to happiness wn2ad
The most important aspect of life is happiness. In today's world people assume a person is happy if they are smiling or if they are wealthy. The level of happiness is related to the lifestyle of a person as well as the environment they live in. It is a hard task to define happiness of the fact that every indiviual's happiness differs due to their needs. The most crucial factors achieving happiness is the attitude as well as the goals they achieve. The defintion of happiness ranges from person to person. A numerous number of people hapiness is related to money, while others hapiness depends on the surrondinds they live in. Although if a person is financially well supported it does not mean that they are happy. A numerous number of people have everything they wish for but still are not happy of that fact that they feel that there is always something missing in their life. For instance, A person whose goals is to achieve wealth, in this process they tend to sacrifice time and do not enjoy life which is an imporant aspect in obtaining happiness. The most important aspects of happiness are money and family. If an person is rich, then he/she can afford for any sort of resources in which they feel happy. For instance, many people want to travel the world in order to feel happy, but only the rich can afford this. Another factor of happiness is family and friends, If a person has someone to share his sorrows and support them when needed, then the happiness is increased substantially. For example, A recent survey concluded that if an individual has someone to lean on when needed, This increases the level of happiness by 20%. To conclude, It is certainly difficult to explain happiness as it is a peronality trait. However, the most crucial factors in order to obtain happiness is wealth and from support of family as well as friends. It is said that the whole life of a human depends on the level of happiness.
The most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
aspect of life is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
. In
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today
'
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s


world
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people
assume a
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person
is
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happy
if they are smiling or

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if
they are wealthy. The level of
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happiness
is related
to
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the


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
lifestyle
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
as
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well
as the environment they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in.

It is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
task to define
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
of the fact that every

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
indiviual
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
differs due to their needs. The
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
most


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
crucial
factors achieving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is the attitude as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as

the goals they achieve.

The
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defintion
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
ranges from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
. A

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
numerous
number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
hapiness
is related
to money, while

others
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hapiness
depends on the
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surrondinds
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in.

“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is
financially
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well supported
it does

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not
mean that they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
. A numerous number of
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people


have everything they wish for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
still
are not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
of that

fact that they feel that there is always something missing in

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their
life.
For instance
, A
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person
whose goals
Possible agreement error. You should probably use: "am", "are", "aren".
is
to
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achieve


wealth, in this process they tend to sacrifice time and

do not enjoy life which is an
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imporant
aspect in obtaining

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
happiness
.

The most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
aspects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
are money and family.

If
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is rich, then he/she can afford for any

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sort
of resources in which they feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
.
For instance
,

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
want to travel the world in order to feel happy,

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but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the rich can afford this. Another factor of
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
happiness


is family and friends, If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
has someone to share his

sorrows and support them when needed, then the happiness

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is
increased
substantially
.
For example
, A recent
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
survey


concluded that if an individual has someone to lean on when

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
needed
, This increases the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
by 20%.

To conclude
, It is
certainly
difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
happiness

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
as
it is a
Possible spelling mistake found.
peronality
trait.
However
, the most crucial factors

in order to obtain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is wealth and from support of

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
family
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as friends. It
is said
that the whole
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
life


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
of
a human depends on the level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
.
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IELTS essay level of happiness and the factors related to happiness

Essay
  American English
32 paragraphs
343 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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