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lamb to the slaughter Mary and her husband

lamb to the slaughter Mary and her husband PElMj
Right after I said that Mary asked: “So what is it daring? It seems like bad news. ” She whispered “I hope it’s not. I’ve made a good deal for you” I answered “Then say it now, I'm willing to listen to you. ” “After 7 years working hard, they finally decided to promote me. I’ll become a police commissioner at the police station in New York - which is 4690 km from here. The salary they pay for me is twice my old salary now. ” I’ve slowly elucidated the situation to her. “That is wonderful! Why are you looking so miserable, darling? I and your child can move to New York to support you. You don’t need to worry about us. ” I took a slight sigh and started to say: “Sadly, I guess I have to. There is one rule: I must be single and don’t have children. They said that marriage and children will be a huge distraction for a police commissioner. And if… just if I have any trouble while doing my work and die, they don’t want to get responsible for my wife and my child. When I become a police commissioner, I’ll have to go on business trips regularly to get all my work done. ” “Wh. . . What do you mean? ” She stuttered. I took one deep breath: “ I decide to divorce. I know that you’re 6th month pregnant but I don’t have any other choices. ” And then I tell her the words from the bottom of my heart: “I’m sorry Mary” “No, I don’t understand. Why would my husband treat me like this? ” Mary exclaimed “Calm down Mary. I promise after we divorce I’ll give you enough money to pay for your life. I’ll hire a nanny to take care of you and the baby. I’ll try to go with you the day you are born the child. After the child is born, I’ll come here and see him once a month. In simple terms, everything will stay the same, just a small difference is I’m not living with you here anymore. ” I’m waiting for an answer from Mary but all that I receive is only silence. At the moment I’m about to lose my patience, Mary finally answered me: “Let me have some time to think” Then, she went upstairs to our bedroom and locked the door.
Right after I said that Mary asked:

“
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
what is it daring? It seems like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
news. ” She
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
whispered


“I hope it’s not. I’ve made a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
deal for you” I
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
answered


“Then say it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, I'm willing to listen to you. ”

“After 7 years working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
, they
finally
decided to promote me. I’ll become a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
commissioner at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
station in New York
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
which is 4690 km from here. The salary they pay for me is twice my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
salary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. ” I’ve
slowly
elucidated the situation to her.

“
That is
wonderful! Why are you looking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
miserable, darling? I and your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to New York to support you. You don’t need to worry about us. ”

I took a slight sigh and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to say: “
Sadly
, I guess I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
. There is one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
: I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be single and don’t have children. They said that marriage and children will be a huge distraction for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
commissioner. And if…
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
Did you mean "is"?
if
I have any trouble while doing my work and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
, they don’t want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
responsible for my wife and my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
. When I become a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
police
commissioner, I’ll
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go on business trips
regularly
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
all my work done. ”

“
Possible spelling mistake found.
Wh
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
What do you mean? ” She stuttered.

I took one deep breath:
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
“
I decide to divorce. I know that
Did you mean "your"?
you’re
6th month pregnant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I don’t have any other choices. ” And then I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
her the words from the bottom of my heart: “I’m sorry Mary
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
”


“No, I don’t understand. Why would my husband treat me like this? ” Mary
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
exclaimed


“Calm down Mary. I promise after we divorce I’ll give you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
money to pay for your life. I’ll hire a nanny to take care of you and the baby.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
’ll try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
go with
you the day you
are born
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
. After the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is born
, I’ll
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
here and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
him once a month. In simple terms, everything will stay the same,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
difference is I’m not living with you here anymore. ”

I’m waiting for an answer from Mary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
all that I receive is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
silence. At the moment I’m about to lose my patience, Mary
finally
answered me:

“
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
me have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
”

Then, she went upstairs to our bedroom and locked the door.
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IELTS essay lamb to the slaughter Mary and her husband

Essay
  American English
14 paragraphs
403 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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