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journalist should pay more attention to ordinary people instead of famous people

journalist should pay more attention to ordinary people instead of famous people Doo6W
As society becomes more and more concerned with the problems happening in the world, influential people become a social norm, helping people to learn, admire and follow their every action, because So it's become very common for today's journalists and reporters to spend a lot of time searching for information and writing articles about a famous person. but some argue that it is not necessary to give too much attention to celebrities such as athletes, singers, or actors. Instead, people should care about the lives of ordinary people. In my opinion, I disagree with the above opinion. First, famous people or people covered by journalists are not only stars, actors, artists, but also people who study well, succeed or have won medals in major competitions. they can demonstrate their ability, show their determination to work and study, they can also share their research methods to help people learn and follow, which is a good example. Secondly, in addition to good learners or athletes, we also have artists such as singers and actors. they are influential people, often trained in skills and manners, so they are often very careful about their statements, how to behave with people, have to do good things to help people, and have responsible for conveying positivity and sympathy to the audience. Because they are influential, whatever they do can influence people, make people do and think according to them. So it's understandable and normal for their lives to be watched and cared for. In the end, paying attention to the lives of ordinary people is less likely to bring great value and really convey to people because ordinary people's lives are not necessarily complete. effort and effort, because if they had, they would have been interested and known by many people. Even ordinary people who get the news will have little value in terms of inspiration. so I think it's normal for people including journalists to be interested in the lives of celebrities and nothing needs to be changed.
As society becomes more and more concerned with the problems happening in the world, influential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
become a social norm, helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to learn, admire and follow their every action,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it's become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's journalists and reporters to spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
time searching for information and writing articles about a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
person.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
argue that it is not necessary to give too much attention to celebrities such as athletes, singers, or actors.
Instead
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should care about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In my opinion, I disagree with the above opinion.
First
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
covered by journalists are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
stars, actors, artists,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who study well, succeed or have won medals in major competitions.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
they
can demonstrate their ability,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their determination to work and study, they can
also
share their research methods to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
learn and follow, which is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example.
Secondly
,
in addition
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
learners or athletes, we
also
have artists such as singers and actors.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
they
are influential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
trained in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and manners,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
careful about their statements, how to behave with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
things to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, and have responsible for conveying positivity and sympathy to the audience.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
they are influential, whatever they do can influence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
according to them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it's understandable and normal for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
and cared for. In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, paying attention to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is less likely to bring great value and
really
convey to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
are not
necessarily
complete.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
effort
and effort,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if they had, they would have
been interested
and known by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the news will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
value in terms of inspiration.
Use a comma before 'so' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
so
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it's normal for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
including journalists to
be interested
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
of celebrities and nothing needs to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
.
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If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay journalist should pay more attention to ordinary people instead of famous people

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
333 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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