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It is suggested that every one wants to have a car , a telivision ,a fridge . Do disadvantages of this development for society outweigh its advantages.

It is suggested that every one wants to have a car, a telivision, a fridge. Do disadvantages of this development for society outweigh its advantages. g8ogD
In today's era, advancement of technology provide us various platforms of entertainment and comfort, each and every person desirre to have own own these. Aper my perspective, demeirts of this growth does not outnumbered it's merits. Starting with positives of this upgradation, the predominant one is smoothness. Precisely, with the invention of machines lives become more easy. To exemplify it, computer can calculate very difficult numbers very quickly, whereas human minds take time. Therefore, persons love to buy these sources, to live life in a more easy way and joyfully. Probing further, machines add productivity in humans life, in other words, dwellers can perform tasks better and do works properly. For instance, a survey revealed, machines make less mistakes to produce any particular item more than once but individual is unable to make exact thing again. As a result, life' s productivity boosts with this growth. On the contrary, what are drawbacks of this development to community, first and foremostly, lack in ability. To describe it, humans become habitual of doing tasks via machines, their physical and mental abilities are declining. To encapsulate, although this decreased the human abilities, it provides comfort and productivity to them. 'Definitely', disadvantages of this advancement does not outweigh it's advantages.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's era, advancement of technology provide us various platforms of entertainment and comfort, each and every person
Possible spelling mistake found.
desirre
to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
these.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aper
my perspective,
Possible spelling mistake found.
demeirts
of this growth does not
The verb 'does' requires base form of the verb: "outnumber"
outnumbered
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (=it is)?
it's
merits. Starting with positives of this
Possible spelling mistake found.
upgradation
, the predominant one is smoothness.
Precisely
, with the invention of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
become more easy. To exemplify it, computer can calculate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult numbers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
minds take time.
Therefore
, persons
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
these sources, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
life in a more easy way and
joyfully
. Probing
further
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
productivity in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
life,
in other words
, dwellers can perform tasks better and do works
properly
.
For instance
, a survey revealed,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun mistakes is countable.
less
mistakes to produce any particular item more than once
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
individual is unable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
exact thing again.
As a result
, life' s productivity boosts with this growth.
On the contrary
, what are drawbacks of this development to community,
first
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
foremostly
, lack in ability. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
it,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
become habitual of doing tasks via
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
, their physical and mental abilities are declining. To encapsulate, although this decreased the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
abilities, it provides comfort and productivity to them. 'Definitely', disadvantages of this advancement does not outweigh
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (=it is)?
it's
advantages.
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IELTS essay It is suggested that every one wants to have a car, a telivision, a fridge. Do disadvantages of this development for society outweigh its advantages.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
206 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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