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It is ongoing debate whether economy or climate has more impact on individuals daily life

It is ongoing debate whether economy or climate has more impact on individuals daily life gAqL3
GsjsjIt is deemed by a section of society that individuals life is affected by climate while others believe that economy has a great impact on their way of living. l consider that economy of a nation has more impact on dwellers life. Nevertheless, I shall shed light on both perspectives. To commence with, the point of view of those people who claim that climate impact masses life. Firstly, according to weather condition people enjoy their life as in cold weather, people prefer to stay at home and spend their quality of time with family members. Along with this, during pleasent days, the majority of youngsters engage in outdoor activities such as cricket or basketball and thus different tasks are being done by individuals according to weather condition. Moreover, due to natural calamities people are facing a lot of difficulties such flood in gujrat in 2007 which destroys thousands of Gujaratis home and they lost their families and thus life of masses if effected by climate. However, on the other hand, there are several economic factor which has positive impact on individuals daily life as better economy of a country means people have a money in order to fulfill their needs. USA is a case in point where due to high GDP Americans living style is luxury as campared to other countries. In contrast, underdeveloped countries do not have adequate resources due to that many people are suffering from poverty which means that economy of nation impact their natives living style. In conclusion, although climate affects dwellers life in some cases, economy has more effect their way of life.
Possible spelling mistake found.
GsjsjIt
is deemed
by a section of society that
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "individuals'" or "individual's"?
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by climate while others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
has a great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impact
on their way of living.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
l
consider that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
of a nation has more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impact
on
Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean "dwellers'" or "dweller's"?
dwellers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Nevertheless
, I shall shed light on both perspectives.

To commence with, the point of view of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who claim that climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impact
masses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Firstly
, according to weather condition
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
enjoy their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
weather,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to stay at home and spend their quality of time with family members. Along with this, during
Possible spelling mistake found.
pleasent
days, the majority of youngsters engage in outdoor activities such as cricket or basketball and
thus
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
tasks are
being done
by individuals according to weather condition.
Moreover
, due to natural calamities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are facing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
difficulties such flood in
Possible spelling mistake found.
gujrat
in 2007 which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroys
thousands of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Gujaratis
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
home and
they lost their families and
thus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of masses if effected by climate.

However
,
on the other hand
, there are several economic
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "factors"?
factor
which has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impact
on individuals daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
of a country means
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "money".
a money
in order to fulfill their needs. USA is a case in point where due to high GDP Americans living style is luxury as
Possible spelling mistake found.
campared
to other countries.
In contrast
, underdeveloped countries do not have adequate resources due to that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are suffering from poverty which means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
of nation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impact
their natives living style.

In conclusion
, although climate affects dwellers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
has more effect their way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.

IELTS essay It is ongoing debate whether economy or climate has more impact on individuals daily life

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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