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It is important to maintain a right balance of your work and other respects of one’s life such as family and leisure sport. What is your opinion about this? Discuss with appropriate examples.

It is important to maintain a right balance of your work and other respects of one’s life such as family and leisure sport. What is your opinion about this? Discuss with appropriate examples. PVkYB
Balance is needed in all aspects of life. In this modern era, to maintain an adequate balance of work life is very important. These days, there is an ongoing debate that balance of work life as compared to other areas such as family and leisure sport. In this essay, I will provide my point of view by analyzing the work-life balance with other activities. Things will not be in good shape if twenty hours of a day is consumed in work. Workaholic people are one-dimensional people who feel difficulties in their life. For instance, according to a study by the University of Texas revealed that the human brain is a special type of machines which needs complete rest before doing work again. Hence, people need to clear their mind by utilizing their mind to other healthy activities like sports. On the other hand, the family is the key aspect for any person in this world. People who work well also need to allocate quality time with their family. For example, a survey done in the 21st century showed that employees who had spent quality time their children and wife are happier and their performance in professional life is far better than those who do not have this good habit. Therefore, people should be careful enough to divide their time between the work and the family in such a way that nothing should be affected. In a nutshell, work, family and other activities are an important factor in one’s life. Thus, people need to balance it in some way. This essay discussed the benefits of the balanced work life and deleterious effects of it unbalanced one.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Balance
is needed
in all aspects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. In this modern era, to maintain an adequate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
balance
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. These days, there is an ongoing debate that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
balance
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
areas such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and leisure sport. In this essay, I will provide my point of view by analyzing the work-life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
balance
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
activities.

Things will not be in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
shape if twenty hours of a day
is consumed
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. Workaholic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are one-dimensional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
feel difficulties in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
For instance
, according to a study by the University of Texas revealed that the human brain is a special type of machines which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
complete rest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
again.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
their mind by utilizing their mind to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
healthy activities like sports.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is the key aspect for any person in this world.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
well
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to allocate quality time with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
For example
, a survey done in the 21st century
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that employees
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
had spent quality time their children and wife are happier and their performance in professional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is far better than those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
do not have this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
habit.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should be careful
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to divide their time between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
in such a way that nothing should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
.

In a nutshell,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
activities are an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factor in one’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
balance
it in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
way. This essay discussed the benefits of the balanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and deleterious effects of it unbalanced one.
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IELTS essay It is important to maintain a right balance of your work and other respects of one’s life such as family and leisure sport. What is your opinion about this? Discuss with appropriate examples.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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