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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?It is important to know about events happening around the world, even if it is possible that they will affect your daily life.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

It is important to know about events happening around the world, even if it is possible that they will affect your daily life. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. MMwDk
With the global revolution and technological advancement of today's world is so fast as a global village. For the technological explosion, people now easily get information from any continent of the world. However, there is a plethora of people content that every people should know the world news but others disagree with the support. Not surprisingly, the number of controversies over this issue is overwhelmed. Among this controversy, I cogently prefer the first one. There are several reasons for holding this aspect I will elaborate followings. To commence with, updated with news not only for the knowledge or information but it also helps to protect own from various illegal activities like crime, trap on a prohibitive group, blackmailing group etc. By knowing these information people can easily predict the situation and can protect himself. For example, recently in Bangladesh one of the major news of 'woman abuse in Saudi Arab'. The government of Bangladesh transmit women to Saudi Arab for the household work but most of the women after returning from Saudia Arab claims that they torture, exploit, rape and harass in many ways. Some of them return as a dead body. However, those women go to Saudia Arab because they will earn more and can easily support their family. Besides, almost all of them do not have enough knowledge about the condition of the country. But, TV, newspaper, social media plays a pivotal role here, they try to aware of the other women not to go off to any country without knowing the proper information. Another exquisite point is that getting information from media people can easily take a crucial decision in political, business, job, investment, economics, etc. Global business, political environment plays a vital role in the current situation of the country. For particular, the event of 9/11 happened in the united states but its impact striking not only in the USA but also in other countries. Most of the country's economy was declined drastically and also sharing market, job sector of the company faced various difficulty. Thus, people can make a decision by watching the updated news. Another young children are the future of our society and if they know this phenomenon they will perceive many histories which is important for decision making. To recapitulate, having knowledge in different section makes people more realistic and provide a profound realization which is necessary for every step of our life unless it affects our daily life or not.
With the global revolution and technological advancement of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
as a global village. For the technological explosion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
from any continent of the world.
However
, there is a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
content that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should know the world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others disagree with the support. Not
surprisingly
, the number of controversies over this issue
is overwhelmed
. Among this controversy, I
cogently
prefer the
first
one. There are several reasons for holding this aspect I will elaborate followings.

To commence with, updated with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for the knowledge or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to protect
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
from various illegal activities like crime, trap on a prohibitive group, blackmailing group etc. By knowing these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
predict the situation and can protect himself.
For example
, recently in Bangladesh one of the major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
of 'woman abuse in Saudi Arab'. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of Bangladesh
Did you mean "transmits"?
transmit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
to Saudi Arab for the household work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
after returning from
Possible spelling mistake found.
Saudia
Arab claims that they torture, exploit, rape and harass in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of them return as a dead body.
However
, those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
go to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Saudia
Arab
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they will earn more and can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
support their family.
Besides
, almost all of them do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
knowledge about the condition of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, TV, newspaper, social media plays a pivotal role here, they try to aware of the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
not to go off to any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
without knowing the proper information.

Another exquisite point is that getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
from media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
easily
take a crucial decision in political, business, job, investment, economics, etc. Global business, political environment plays a vital role in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
situation of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. For particular, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
of 9/11 happened in the
The proper noun "United States" needs to be capitalized.
united states
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
its impact striking not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in the USA
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Most of the country's economy
was declined
drastically
and
also
sharing market, job sector of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
faced various difficulty.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a decision by watching the updated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. Another young children are the future of our society and if they know this phenomenon they will perceive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
histories which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
decision making
.

To recapitulate, having knowledge in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
section
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
more realistic and provide a profound realization which is necessary for every step of our life unless it affects our daily life or not.
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IELTS essay It is important to know about events happening around the world, even if it is possible that they will affect your daily life. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
409 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?It is important to know about events happening around the world, even if it is possible that they will affect your daily life.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.