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It is important for all cities and towns to have large outdoor public spaces, such as parks or squares. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

It is important for all cities and towns to have large outdoor public spaces, such as parks or squares. with this opinion? w6Lq
In recent years, many nations are showing great interest on constructing public spaces such as parks and squares across all major cities and towns. It is argued by many that public spaces are extremely beneficial to the modern lifestyle. However, some people claims that governments are wasting huge amount of reserves for construction and maintenance of gardens which are useless. I believe that public spaces should be available in every city and town. First and foremost reason is public parks should be built in all towns and metros for the sake of improving public's health. Nowadays, most of the people are having hectic day-to-day schedules and working harder and harder to survive in this cut-throat competitive world. Moreover, people are travelling long distances to commute their work spaces and breathing polluted air. Therefore, having public parks not only provides a place for individuals to walk and do exercises in a beautiful green area, they can also take fresh air, relax and maintain physical fitness. Secondly, with the tremendous improvements in communication, most of the individuals are spending very less time to interact with society. Having easy access to squares helps people to get involved in different cultural programs and showcase their unique talents. Moreover, most of the community halls are built in such way to publicize the native culture. As a result, plazas help to improve individual social well-being and also preserve culture for future generations. In conclusion, I once again reaffirm that public places should be built and continued for the benefit of residents health and preservation of culture. I believe the more number of public spaces makes the people life joyful and healthy.
In recent years,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations are showing great interest on constructing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spaces
such as parks and squares across all major cities and towns. It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spaces
are
extremely
beneficial to the modern lifestyle.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
claims
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
are wasting huge amount of reserves for construction and maintenance of gardens which are useless. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spaces
should be available in every city and town.

First
and foremost reason is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
parks should
be built
in all towns and metros for the sake of improving public's health. Nowadays, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are having hectic day-to-day schedules and working harder and harder to survive in this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
-throat competitive world.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are travelling long distances to commute their work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spaces
and breathing polluted air.
Therefore
, having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
parks not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
provides a place for individuals to walk and do exercises in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
green area, they can
also
take fresh air, relax and maintain physical fitness.

Secondly
, with the tremendous improvements in communication, most of the individuals are spending
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
less time to interact with society. Having easy access to squares
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
involved in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultural programs and showcase their unique talents.
Moreover
, most of the community halls
are built
in such way to publicize the native culture.
As a result
, plazas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
individual social well-being and
also
preserve culture for future generations.

In conclusion
, I once again reaffirm that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
places should
be built
and continued for the benefit of residents health and preservation of culture. I believe the more number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spaces
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
life joyful and healthy.
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IELTS essay It is important for all cities and towns to have large outdoor public spaces, such as parks or squares. with this opinion?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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