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It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be. Give some reasons why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought closer together. Include any relevant examples from your experience.

It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be. Give some reasons why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought closer together. Include any relevant examples from your experience. yXDDg
Family is the base and pillar of the person which support their members always. However, these days the relationship bond is not so strong as it was in the past. This essay will describe about the causes of why people are living apart from their family and how they can be closed with each other in the subsequent paragraphs. To begin with, one of the major causes is the advancement in social media. Due to the fact of using various social websites such as facebook, whatsapp, twitter and many more people waste their lots of time in them as compared to talk to their parents or other family members. Moreover, nowadays a plethora of individuals go abroad for work and study because of which they get disconnected from their families for some years or may be permanent. Apart from it, in this workaholic era, most of the people are busy in their work due to which they are unable to spend so much time with their family. On the other hand, there are several ways by which the family bond can be made strong such as it is advisable to every individual that mobiles phones and other entertainment thing things should be used less in home and instead of it they should give time for their family. In addition to it, as many persons prefer to take meals in their personal room but it should be done on dining table with all family members because of which they get this time to talk with each other and it enhances their relationship bond. To conclude, most of the people are busy in themselves and they like to live alone, however family is a most important part of everone’s life, and family members are the only persons who deal with troubles of each other. Therefore family should be prioritize by every person.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Family
is the base and pillar of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
which support their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
The adverb 'always' is usually not used at the end of a sentence.
always
.
However
, these days the relationship bond is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
strong as it was in the past. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
about the causes of why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are living apart from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and how they can
be closed
with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
in the subsequent paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one of the major causes is the advancement in social media. Due to the fact of using various social websites such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
facebook
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
whatsapp
, twitter and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
waste their lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in them as compared to talk to their parents or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
.
Moreover
, nowadays a plethora of individuals go abroad for work and study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
disconnected from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
years or may be permanent. Apart from it, in this workaholic era, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are busy in their work due to which they are unable to spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their family.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are several ways by which the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
bond can
be made
strong such as it is advisable to every individual that mobiles phones and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
entertainment thing things should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
less in home and
instead
of it they should give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
In addition
to it, as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
persons
prefer to take meals in their personal room
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it should
be done
on dining table with all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to talk with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
and it enhances their relationship bond.

To conclude
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are busy in
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
themselves and
they like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
alone,
however
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is a most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of
Possible spelling mistake found.
everone
’s life, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
are the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
persons
who deal with troubles of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
should be
Consider using the past participle "prioritized"?
prioritize
by every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
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IELTS essay It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be. Give some reasons why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought closer together. Include any relevant examples from your experience.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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