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It is a fact that the internet is becoming important and popular with users all around the world

It is a fact that the internet is becoming important and popular with users all around the world Dom5o
It is a fact that the internet is becoming important and popular with users all around the world. This trend would create certain benefits but there will also be some drawbacks. On the one hand, it is clear that the internet would create several advantages. The first strength is that users are easy to use smart technologies like: laptop, phone, iPad… to access to network. For instance, in COVID–19, students can not go to school but due to using internet, they can learn online with their teachers and friends through apps such as: Zoom, Teams. Addition to, most of the knowledge in web is also free. In particular, users look for information what they need, or they feel useful. As a result, they can develop talent or intelligence thanks to studying on the internet. On the other hand, there are some obvious disadvantages that would rise. First, the internet world is very dangerous. In fact, network is so wide that parents can not control when their children use. Therefore, the children are easy to be attacked by strangers without protecting of parents. Second, the information in web can not trust completely. Particularly, it can fake news because no one checks the information in network. This leads to that users will have useless information and it causes harmful for them. In conclusion, there are plus points to using the internet regarding accessing to network and much of free knowledge in there. However, the drawbacks would emerge consequently in term of being dangerous and fake news.
It is a fact that the internet is becoming
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and popular with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
all around the world. This trend would create certain benefits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there will
also
be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks.

On the one hand, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the internet would create several advantages. The
first
strength is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
are easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
smart technologies like: laptop, phone, iPad… to access to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
network
.
For instance
, in
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
COVID
–19, students can not go to school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
due to using internet, they can learn online with their teachers and friends through apps such as: Zoom, Teams. Addition to, most of the knowledge in web is
also
free.
In particular
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
look for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
what they need, or they feel useful.
As a result
, they can develop talent or intelligence thanks to studying on the internet.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
obvious disadvantages that would rise.
First
, the internet world is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
. In fact,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
network
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
wide that parents can not control when their children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
Therefore
, the children are easy to
be attacked
by strangers without protecting of parents. Second, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
in web can not trust completely.
Particularly
, it can fake news
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
no one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
checks
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
network
. This leads to that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
will have useless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
and it causes harmful for them.

In conclusion
, there are plus points to using the internet regarding accessing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
network
and much of free knowledge in there.
However
, the drawbacks would emerge
consequently
in term of being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
and fake news.

IELTS essay It is a fact that the internet is becoming important and popular with users all around the world

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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