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Is the importing food from other countries has more advantages than disadvantages?

Is the importing food from other countries has more advantages than disadvantages? WYWND
Food is a basic need for all of us to survive in this planet. Thus, we all want varieties in our food intake. Therefore, certain segments of the society opine that buying different food items from international boundaries is needed very beneficial. However, others are in opposition of it. But, I believe that this trend has both merits and demerits which I will elaborate in the upcoming paragraphs. There are multifarious advantages of importing food from different places. First and foremost, some food items are only available in specific regions of other nations. And, health conscious denizens want to include that things in their daily food consumption in the form of vitamins, minerals, carbohydrates, fibres and so on. What is more, people can enjoy non seasonal fruits and vegetables at any given time of year. Eventually, they do not have to wait long for season to come and eat such foods. In addition, they can enhance their health by consuming different kinds of food. On the contrary, importing food from other countries can put burden on the economy, and it is directly proportional to inflation. As a result, some netizens can feel reluctance to purchase these items due to it's high price rates. Because this thing can add extra cost to their pockets. Moreover, most of the recieved cuisines from non national states are preserved in stores and not fresh to eat. Consequently, sometimes, it deteriorates nutritional values before reaching to the mouth of consumers. As a result, it can cause people health hazardous or indigestion problems. To conclude, considering the positive and negative effects of important food. I assert that we ought to welcome this development but it should come at the cost of health and economy of the country where this food is exported
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Food
is a basic need for all of us to survive in this planet.
Thus
, we all want
The usual preposition for "varieties" is "of" not "in." Revise: "varieties of".
varieties in
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
intake.
Therefore
, certain segments of the society opine that buying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items from international boundaries
is needed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial.
However
, others are in opposition of it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, I believe that this trend has both merits and demerits which I will elaborate in the upcoming paragraphs.

There are multifarious advantages of importing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places.
First
and foremost,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
available in specific regions of other nations. And,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
conscious denizens want to include that things in their daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
consumption in the form of vitamins, minerals, carbohydrates,
Possible spelling mistake. 'fibres' is British English.
fibres
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
What is more
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can enjoy
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
non seasonal
fruits and vegetables at any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
time of year.
Eventually
, they do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
wait long for season to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
and eat such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
.
In addition
, they can enhance their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
by consuming
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of food.

On the contrary
, importing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
from other countries can put burden on the economy, and it is
directly
proportional to inflation.
As a result
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
netizens can feel reluctance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
these items due to
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun)?
it's
high price rates.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
this thing can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
extra cost to their pockets.
Moreover
, most of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
recieved
cuisines from
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
non national
states
are preserved
in stores and not fresh to eat.
Consequently
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
, it deteriorates nutritional values
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
reaching to the mouth of consumers.
As a result
, it can cause
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
hazardous or indigestion problems.
To conclude
, considering the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. I assert that we ought to welcome this development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
at the cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and economy of the country where this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
exported
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IELTS essay Is the importing food from other countries has more advantages than disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
295 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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