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Is government responsible for the rise in obesity in children.

Is government responsible for the rise in obesity in children. 86oEP
One of the major concern of todays parents is increasing obesity in children. It is a big topic of the debate whether the governement is held responsible for this rise in obesity or not. In my view, government plays a crucial role in the sharply growing obesity in children. In my view lack of strict regulations on junk food advertisement is one of the reason for increase in obesity. As children are easily swayed by these advertisements & tend to eat such unhealthy foods only, make them fatter day by day. For example enticing advertisements of junk foods have a strong affect on children mind. If government bodies control these advertisements, our children can be protected. Another critical reason which is responsible for increasing weight of children is lack of regulation on portion size offered by the unhealty food joints. Due to the large portion size children are tend to eat more unhealthy unsaturated fat, bad carbohydrates and extra sucrose which make them obese. For example soft drinks offered by most fast food chains does not come in a smaller size, hence children get the habit of drinking larger quantity. If governement regulates the portion sizes offered by these food chains, there is a possiblity the increasing wieght of children can reduce. It can be concluded that governement plays a very vital role in controling the health of nations next generation. To protect our children from obesity it is very important that the policies should be made considering the health of the children.
One of the major concern of
todays
parents is increasing obesity in
children
. It is a
big
topic of the debate whether the
governement
is held
responsible for this rise in obesity or not. In my view,
government
plays a crucial role in the
sharply
growing obesity in children.

In my view lack of strict regulations on junk
food
advertisement
is one of the reason for increase in obesity. As
children
are
easily
swayed by these
advertisements
& tend to eat such unhealthy
foods
only
,
make
them fatter day by day.
For example
enticing
advertisements
of junk
foods
have a strong
affect
on
children
mind. If
government
bodies control these
advertisements
, our
children
can
be protected
.

Another critical reason which is responsible for increasing weight of
children
is lack of regulation on portion
size
offered by the
unhealty
food
joints. Due to the large portion
size
children
are
tend
to eat more unhealthy unsaturated
fat
,
bad
carbohydrates and extra sucrose which
make
them obese.
For example
soft drinks offered by most
fast
food
chains does not
come
in a smaller
size
,
hence
children
get
the habit of drinking larger quantity. If
governement
regulates the portion
sizes
offered by these
food
chains, there is a
possiblity
the increasing
wieght
of
children
can
reduce
.

It can
be concluded
that
governement
plays a
very
vital role in
controling
the health of nations
next
generation. To protect our
children
from obesity it is
very
important
that the policies should
be made
considering the health of the
children
.
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IELTS essay Is government responsible for the rise in obesity in children.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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