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Is data sharing valid nowadays. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Is data sharing valid nowadays. Discuss both view and give your opinion. EMBD
There is no doubt that sharing information for various research is common nowadays. However, some believe that it is acceptable to share data, while others believe to its contrary. I would argue in the favor of not giving all data for the research. Firstly, in now open and globalized society, sharing and trasfering of relevant data is common. People often give permission to it becasue it helps in devising effective public policy by the governemnt or its subsidiary agencies. For instance, indian go
There is no doubt that sharing information for various research is common nowadays.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that it is acceptable to share data, while others
The usual collocation for "believe" is "in" not "to". Did you mean "believe in"?
believe to
its contrary. I would argue in the favor of not giving all data for the research.
Firstly
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
open and globalized society, sharing and
Possible spelling mistake found.
trasfering
of relevant data is common.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
give permission to it
Possible spelling mistake found.
becasue
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in devising effective public policy by the
Possible spelling mistake found.
governemnt
or its subsidiary agencies.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
indian
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
go

IELTS essay Is data sharing valid nowadays. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
82 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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  • Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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