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integrated task- reward

integrated task- reward pRDRd
The passage explains that encouraging employees by different types of rewards promotes the productivity of the work force. However, the professor introduces some flaws in the idea that cast doubt on the efficacy of the reward systems. First of all, he mentions that the reward is actually perceived as a kind of punishment because those who are not rewarded feel disappointed. In fact, rewarding in response to productivity of the workers is considered as a manipulative approach. Thus, it spreads an unhappy atmosphere rather than a happy productive one. It is in contrast to the passage saying that rewarding improves the attitude of the employees. Secondly, the lecturer indicates that bigger rewards which are not achieved result in greater disappointment. This casts doubt on the point in the passage that suggests tight links between performance and rewards lead to greater improvement in motivational effects. Finally. he argues that the rewarding affects the quality and the quantity of the produce. The employee who eagerly desires for the reward has a lesser tendency to report a problem to his or her supervisor than an employee who is not concerned with rewards. This is not in agreement with the passage that says a correctly structured system of rewarding convinces people to achieve remarkable productivity.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
that encouraging employees by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
promotes the productivity of the work force.
However
, the professor introduces
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
flaws in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that cast doubt on the efficacy of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
systems.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, he mentions that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
is actually perceived as a kind of punishment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
those who are not rewarded feel disappointed. In fact,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewarding
in response to productivity of the workers
is considered
as a manipulative approach.
Thus
, it spreads an unhappy atmosphere
rather
than a happy productive one. It is
in contrast
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
saying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewarding
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the attitude of the employees.

Secondly
, the lecturer indicates that bigger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
which are not achieved result in greater disappointment. This casts doubt on the point in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
that suggests tight links between performance and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
lead to greater improvement in motivational effects.

Finally
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
he
argues that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewarding
affects the quality and the quantity of the produce. The employee who
eagerly
desires for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
has a lesser tendency to report a problem to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
supervisor than an employee who is not concerned with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
. This is not in agreement with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
passage
that says a
correctly
structured system of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewarding
convinces
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to achieve remarkable productivity.
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IELTS essay integrated task- reward

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
211 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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