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Integrated essay- Schooling system

Integrated essay- Schooling system r8D8m
The lecturer points out some weaknesses of the chronologically graded 12-year school system, which is introduced in the reading passage. He highlights the following problems. First of all, he contends that having a fixed age for starting the formal school education, as is mentioned in the reading, is not reasonable. He believes that there are significant discrepancies among children regarding to their physical, mental, and social maturity. Thus, while some children are ready to go to school even in younger ages than 6 the other may need more time to be mature enough for school education. Another problem which is underlined by the lecturer is that the promotion plan in traditional graded system is not proper. According to the passage, students who cannot fulfill the minimum requirements for a grade should repeat the same year. The lecturer says that this leads the students to become bored, to feel lower self-confidence, and to drop out of school. He believes that group based quantitative assessments of the current system should be replaced with individual based qualitative ones. Moreover, the lecturer indicates the differences in the speed of learning among the students of a particular class as another problem of the system described in the passage. He believes that by putting the same aged students in one class some students may have difficulties to grasp the subjects while the other may feel board as the subject seems easy to them. Thus, it is not a good educational system.
The
lecturer
points out
some
weaknesses of the
chronologically
graded 12-year
school
system
, which
is introduced
in the reading passage. He highlights the following problems.

First of all
, he contends that having a
fixed
age for starting the formal
school
education, as
is mentioned
in the reading, is not reasonable. He believes that there are significant discrepancies among children
regarding to
their physical, mental, and social maturity.
Thus
, while
some
children are ready to go to
school
even in younger ages than 6 the other may need more time to be mature
enough
for
school
education.

Another problem which
is underlined
by the
lecturer
is that the promotion plan in traditional graded
system
is not proper. According to the passage,
students
who cannot fulfill the minimum requirements for a grade should repeat the same year. The
lecturer
says that this leads the
students
to become bored, to feel lower self-confidence, and to drop out of
school
. He believes that group based quantitative assessments of the
current
system
should
be replaced
with individual based qualitative ones.

Moreover
, the
lecturer
indicates the differences in the speed of learning among the
students
of a particular
class
as another problem of the
system
described
in the passage. He believes that by putting the same aged
students
in one
class
some
students
may have difficulties to grasp the subjects while the other may feel board as the subject seems easy to them.
Thus
, it is not a
good
educational
system
.
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IELTS essay Integrated essay- Schooling system

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
245 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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