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Integrated essay "Columbus theory"

Integrated essay " Columbus theory" YLmXK
The reading passage was mainly about columbus's voyages away from Spain, trying to prove that his theory concerning the world not being flat is a true theory. The listening passage however, casts doubt on columbus theory. First of all, according to the professor in the lecture, Columbus had already knew that the world was round, because this was known long time ago from the ancient greeks and the philosophers as far as the medieval scholars had also added to the greeks knowledge. This idea is actually opposed by what is mentioned in the reading passage of how Columbus launched into so many voyages in attempt to prove that the world is not flat. Secondly, the professor also mentions how science long time ago, was really used against religion and how there was a real conflict between religion and science, referring to two books that were published at that time whi emphasized on the use of the flat myth of the world for the purpose of spreading war between scientists and religious people, and as the professor also mentions that columbus was a christian, carrying the message of Jesus Christ. This actually refutes with what is mentioned in the reading passage of how columbus was a brutal man, treating other people in unacceptable way.
The reading
passage
was
mainly
about
columbus
's voyages away from Spain, trying to prove that his theory concerning the
world
not being flat is a true theory. The listening
passage
however
, casts doubt on
columbus
theory.

First of all
, according to the professor in the lecture, Columbus had already
knew
that the
world
was round,
because
this
was known
long time ago from the ancient
greeks
and the philosophers as far as the medieval scholars had
also
added
to the
greeks
knowledge. This
idea
is actually opposed by what
is mentioned
in the reading
passage
of how Columbus launched into
so
many
voyages in attempt to prove that the
world
is not flat.

Secondly
, the professor
also
mentions how science long time ago, was
really
used
against religion and how there was a real conflict between religion and science, referring to two books that
were published
at that time
whi
emphasized on the
use
of the flat myth of the
world
for the purpose of spreading war between scientists and religious
people
, and as the professor
also
mentions that
columbus
was a christian, carrying the message of Jesus Christ. This actually refutes with what
is mentioned
in the reading
passage
of how
columbus
was a brutal
man
, treating other
people
in unacceptable way.
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IELTS essay Integrated essay " Columbus theory"

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
213 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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