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in the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With increased use of computers, the internet and smart phones, more and more people are starting to work from home What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

in the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With increased use of computers, the internet and smart phones, more and more people are starting to work from home What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? bGO3
In recent years, the way where we work has a big change. According to the development of technology, several equipment have been applicate on working such as computers and smartphone. Those devices not only change people’s living style but also make that working at home become possible. In my opinion, there are both advantage and disadvantage of this development. Form advantage perspective, it would be great for the employee who work for programming and writing. Firstly, those two works can be done by desktop computer or personal laptop, as well as the good mood, therefore, it will lead a good result if one has chance to stay in the personal space with no bother and use the equipment which one used to. Secondly, it would be much cheaper and save time to travel to their location of work. People can decide to wake up late then usual in order to gain more energy to perform efficiently on work in each day. To the contrary, from disadvantage side, these developments can be extremely negative. Cooperation between people in different personality is an important lesson. However, social with colleague become one of irreplaceable issue people have to build. I do believe the working environment would also affect the efficiency of work. Without the stressful surrounding, people might start to have lazy phenomenon. To recapitulate, to stay and working at the personal area is a good ideal for employee who have ability to work alone. Unfortunately, it would also decrease people’s working efficiency.
In recent years, the way where we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. According to the development of technology,
Possible agreement error. The noun equipment seems to be uncountable; consider using: "some equipment".
several equipment
have been
Possible spelling mistake found.
applicate
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
such as computers and smartphone. Those devices not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
living style
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at home become possible.

In my opinion, there are both advantage and disadvantage of this development. Form advantage perspective, it would be great for the employee who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for programming and writing.
Firstly
, those two works can
be done
by desktop computer or personal laptop,
as well
as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
mood,
therefore
, it will lead a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
result if one has chance to stay in the personal space with no bother and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the equipment which one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to.
Secondly
, it would be much cheaper and save time to travel to their location of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can decide to wake up late then usual in order to gain more energy to perform
efficiently
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in each day.

To the contrary, from disadvantage side, these developments can be
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
. Cooperation between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
personality is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
lesson.
However
, social with colleague become one of irreplaceable issue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
build. I do believe the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
environment would
also
affect the efficiency of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. Without the stressful surrounding,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to have lazy phenomenon.

To recapitulate, to stay and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at the personal area is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
ideal for employee who have ability to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
alone. Unfortunately, it would
also
decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
efficiency.
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IELTS essay in the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With increased use of computers, the internet and smart phones, more and more people are starting to work from home What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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