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In the past, most people lived in small villages where everyone knew everyone else. Nowadays most people live in large cities where they only know a few people in their area. What do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small community?

In the past, most people lived in small villages where everyone knew everyone else. Nowadays most people live in large cities where they only know a few people in their area. What do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small community? 0893
In the past most people used to live in small communities like small villages where almost everyone know about each other. Hoeewver, these days more people live in large cities and because the population is high roughly no one knows about another person. Living in small community has both advantages and disadvantages. I think that the advantages are more than the disadvantages. The main advantage of living in a small village is that finding a job is more easier in small communities than large communities. Also your expenses aren't so high. So you can manage to live with your salary for a month and support your own family. You can be able to buy delicious foods, beautiful clothes, expensive toys for your children and you can also pay for their education easily and you won't be worry about their future. Another advantage of living in a small community is that because not too much people are living there, so there won't be so much traffic and the air isn't polite. Living in a quiet village with clean air can make you feel relax and fresh your mind. Finally living in a small community where everyone know about each other is really helpful. When people know about you, they will act more friendly and whenever you are in trouble they will be there for you and they will do anything that can help you to solve your problem. However living in small villages has some disadvantages too. First when all people know about you, you won't be able to maintain your privacy. Some people will judge about your life, family or work and you are always worry about what they are saying about you. Second, most small villages aren't facilities as large cities. There are lots of restaurants, cinemas, shops, hospitals universities and so on in the large cities that you can not see them in small cities. Finally, although you can find job easily in smallvillages and job opportunities are more in small communities, but making progress is easier in large cities. You might have a same job and do the same thing for years in small village. However in a large city because it's always being developed and by the use of different technologies you can always be ready to improve your job and earn more money. To sum up large cities should provide more jobs for job seekers and governments should have a plan to reduce the expenses and also the traffic and air pollution. When all these problems in large cities be solved, I think living in a large city will be better than living in a small village.
In the past most
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
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small
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communities
like
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small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
where almost everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "knows", "knew".
know
about each other.
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Hoeewver
, these days more
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
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large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the population is high roughly no one
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knows
about another person.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
has both
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advantages
and disadvantages. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
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advantages
are more than the disadvantages. The main
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advantage
of
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living
in a
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small
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village
is that finding a
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job
is
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more easier
in
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small
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communities
than
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large
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communities
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
your expenses aren't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
high.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
you can manage to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
with your salary for a month and support your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
family. You can be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
delicious foods,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
clothes, expensive toys for your children and you can
also
pay for their education
easily
and you won't be worry about their future. Another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not too much
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people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
there,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
there won't be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much traffic and the air isn't polite.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Living
in a quiet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
with clean air can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
you feel relax and fresh your mind.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
where everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "knows", "knew".
know
about each other is
really
helpful. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
about you, they will act more friendly and whenever you are in trouble they will be there for you and they will do anything that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you to solve your problem.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages too.
First
when all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
about you, you won't be able to maintain your privacy.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will judge about your life, family or work and you are always
Consider using a past participle here: "worried".
worry
about what they are saying about you. Second, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
aren't facilities as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. There are lots of restaurants, cinemas, shops, hospitals universities and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
that you can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
them in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
Finally
, although you can find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
easily
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
smallvillages
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities are more in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communities
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
making progress is easier in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. You might have a same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and do the same thing for years in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
city
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it's always
being developed
and by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
technologies you can always be ready to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and earn more money. To sum up
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
should provide more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
seekers and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should have a plan to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the expenses and
also
the traffic and air pollution. When all these problems in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
be solved
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
city will be better than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
.
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IELTS essay In the past, most people lived in small villages where everyone knew everyone else. Nowadays most people live in large cities where they only know a few people in their area. What do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small community?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
442 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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