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In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations. Jdxw
Nowadays, medical treatment and technical resources are increasing. The aim of essay is to recover reasons which to resolve with living longer. There are a lot of reasons for longevity and one of the most contingent occasions for the growing in individual's life expectancy are better health, adequate nutrition, health conditionals and reduced infant death. If means that population will live longer but it has got some problems. Older people more likely suffer from health. Usually, they have poor health and they have not an opportunity for living healthier. As a results if being sick, they do not work and need a larger pension to pay for their longer retirement. In that case we can see age-related chronic illness, like diabetes and muscle pain. In addition, if pension funds may be limited, who will pay? It is evidently, economical problems. It has been proven that for lots of people suffer from loneless. Being lonely affects to homeless and society problems. Additionally these problems could be attributed to the unhealthy lifestyle when them affect health conditionals, they will lost their psychological and physical mind. After that kind of problems, lots of people will live too longer even though their life is full of troubles. Life expectancy is mentioned to emphasise the fact which will go on into the future, so it is a long-term issue. Population can do more with their lives, but only if living longer means being healthier. For feeling healthier everybody obliged to keep their health, be useful for the state and rise age of retirement too solution to decide these problems.
Nowadays, medical treatment and technical resources are increasing. The aim of essay is to recover reasons which to resolve with living longer.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
reasons for longevity and one of the most contingent occasions for the growing in individual's life expectancy are better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
, adequate nutrition,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
conditionals and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
infant death. If means that population will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems.

Older
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more likely suffer from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
Usually
, they have poor
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
health and
they have not an opportunity for living healthier. As a results if being sick, they do not work and need a larger pension to pay for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
retirement.
In that case
we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
age-related chronic illness, like diabetes and muscle pain.
In addition
, if pension funds may
be limited
, who will pay? It is
evidently
,
Did you mean "economic" (=connected with economy)?
economical
problems.

It has
been proven
that for lots of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
suffer from
Possible spelling mistake found.
loneless
. Being lonely affects to homeless and society
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Additionally
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
could
be attributed
to the unhealthy lifestyle when them affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
conditionals, they will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "lose"
lost
their psychological and physical mind. After that kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, lots of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
even though
their life is full of troubles.

Life expectancy
is mentioned
to
Possible spelling mistake. 'emphasise' is British English.
emphasise
the fact which will go on into the future,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is a long-term issue. Population can do more with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
if living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
longer
means being healthier. For feeling healthier everybody obliged to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
, be useful for the state and rise age of retirement too solution to decide these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
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IELTS essay In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
264 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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