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In some societies nowadays kids are often told that they can succeed in anything if they work hard and are patient enough

In some societies nowadays kids are often told that they can succeed in anything if they work hard and are patient enough QldJb
In some societies nowadays kids are often told that they can succeed in anything if they work hard and are patient enough. But is it the reality, are they capable of anything if they want to? And what are the consequences of telling this to the youth? On one hand if young ones are told they can achieve great things if they try to, they may work hard for those things and they will eventually succeed. As a professional soccer who made it to Manchester United and scores every match or scientists who were able to discover treatments and cure for terrible diseases because only of their hard work. This statement also gives hope to the children which will help him became a greater man, a man with faith maybe became a good father, husband or boss. Telling this to children also shows to them how important hard work and never giving up his. But on the other hand, telling children this maybe a lie. If it is a lie and they try as hard as they could and didn’t manage to succeed, they will feel betrayed. Many soccer players never made it to the top teams even if they trained day and night for. Maybe it will be easier to tell the children what many great things he can achieve with the abilities he has and not that anything can be done which is always a lie. For example, they will never be able to move a remote by only the strength of their mind or they won’t be able to heal as fast as wolverine even if they work as hard as it is possible to. To sum up giving children this message is part good and part bad, it is up to you to see if you want to send this kind of information to your sons and daughters or if you want to tell them the truth which may be difficult some time with the younger ones.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
societies nowadays kids are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
that they can succeed in anything if they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
and are patient
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
is it the reality, are they capable of anything if they want to? And what are the consequences of telling this to the youth?

On one hand if young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
they can achieve great things if they try to, they may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
for those
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
things and
they will
eventually
succeed. As a professional soccer who made it to Manchester United and scores every match or scientists who were able to discover treatments and cure for terrible diseases
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. This statement
also
gives hope to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
him became a greater
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
with faith maybe became a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
father, husband or boss. Telling this to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
to them how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and never giving up his.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
on the other hand
, telling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
this maybe a lie. If it is a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
lie and
they try as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
as they could and didn’t manage to succeed, they will feel betrayed.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
soccer players never made it to the top teams even if they trained day and night for. Maybe it will be easier to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
what
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
great things he can achieve with the abilities he has and not that anything can
be done
which is always a lie.
For example
, they will never be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
a remote by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the strength of their
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
mind or
they won’t be able to heal as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
as wolverine even if they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
as it is possible to.

To sum up giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
this message is part
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and part
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
, it is up to you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
if you want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
this kind of information to your sons and daughters or if you want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
them the truth which may be difficult
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time with the younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
.
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IELTS essay In some societies nowadays kids are often told that they can succeed in anything if they work hard and are patient enough

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
331 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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