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In some rich countries, the number of children at secondary or high school who are taking science subjects is declining. What effect might this have on the children’s and their countries’ futures? How can children be encouraged to study science?

In some rich countries, the number of children at secondary or high school who are taking science subjects is declining. What effect might this have on the children’s and their countries’ futures? How can children be encouraged to study science? akwG
Students throughout middle and high school have a declining rate on choosing science subjects in various wealthy nations. This might lead to deteriorating numbers of science researchers in the near future, children can be motivated to study science by making them believe science is easy or fun. Nowadays where the global economy is unstable and salaries are low, many teachers are putting their salary first to earn some money to get through the pandemic, leading to doing other jobs to sustain their living standards which may discourage students to learn science as they will not care about students in general. In addition, many teens think science is a relatively hard topic to learn as there are many complex situations regarding science. These problems can be solved by getting academically proficient teachers with the means to teach children and grow them. There are many teachers out there, however, teachers who truly want to open the eyes of children to science can be hard to come by. If these teachers are brought from foreign countries or found in midst of residents. These people will put students first, also, finding a way to make students love the subject. If fundamentals are solid they children can become aspiring scientists. Generally, science is an important factor in a countries growth and wealth. Having inhabitants that thoroughly love science can be like keeping treasures. I believe that creating people who like science can be obtained via great teachers in those educational facilities as teachers are the ones who truly open one's heart to learn and study.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
throughout middle and high school have a declining rate on choosing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
subjects in various wealthy nations. This might lead to deteriorating numbers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
researchers in the near future,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can
be motivated
to study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
by making them believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
is easy or fun.

Nowadays where the global economy is unstable and salaries are low,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
are putting their salary
first
to earn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
through the pandemic, leading to doing other jobs to sustain their living standards which may discourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
as they will not care about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in general
.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
teens
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
is a
relatively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
topic to learn as there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
complex situations regarding science.

These problems can
be solved
by getting
academically
proficient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
with the means to teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and grow them. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
out there,
however
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
who
truly
want to open the eyes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
by. If these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
are brought
from foreign countries or found in midst of residents. These
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will put
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
first
,
also
, finding a way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
the subject.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
fundamentals are solid they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can become aspiring scientists.

Generally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factor in a countries growth and wealth. Having inhabitants that
thoroughly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
can be like keeping treasures. I believe that creating
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
can
be obtained
via great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
in those educational facilities as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
are the ones who
truly
open one's heart to learn and study.
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IELTS essay In some rich countries, the number of children at secondary or high school who are taking science subjects is declining. What effect might this have on the children’s and their countries’ futures? How can children be encouraged to study science?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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