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In some places, fast food, prepared meals, and sugary drinks are now sold in more shops and at lower prices than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In some places, fast food, prepared meals, and sugary drinks are now sold in more shops and at lower prices than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? KwV6w
Our diet is becoming increasingly unhealthy. This is reflected in the fact that cheap, fast food, and sugary drinks are now found in many shops around the world. However, this low cost and convenience comes at a cost. Undoubtedly, the availability of prepared meals and canned drinks has some advantages. This type of food is abundant because it appeals to our taste buds. People would not eat it so often if they did not crave the taste. The low cost also means that people on a lower income can afford to feed their families, and it is made even more appealing because it also saves time in the kitchen. There are now so many big businesses based on producing this type of food and drink that many workers are dependent on the selling or making of it, and this industry is a key employer of many lower income families. These advantages show that this development is likely to continue for some time. Nevertheless, the negative effects are significant. The low cost of this type of food means that it has become more of a staple diet for many people. It is widely acknowledged that processed and sugary foods are unhealthy, so their widespread consumption is concerning. Such food contains many additives, offers little nutrition, and is largely seen as responsible for the growing obesity problems around the world. In addition, there are links to diabetes, all of which affects the economy as well as putting pressure on the healthcare system. Ultimately, the problems associated with this type of food have an impact on everyone. In conclusion, the availability and convenience of this type of food mean that it is likely to be here to stay. Nevertheless, the long-term health effects show that, on the whole, this is a negative development. Finding a way to increase the cost would go some way to solving this.
Our diet is becoming
increasingly
unhealthy. This
is reflected
in the fact that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, and sugary drinks are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
found in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
shops around the world.
However
, this low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
and convenience
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
at a cost.

Undoubtedly
, the availability of prepared meals and canned drinks has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is abundant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it appeals to our taste buds.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
would not eat it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
if they did not crave the taste. The low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
also
means that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
on a lower income can afford to feed their families, and it
is made
even more appealing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
also
saves time in the kitchen. There are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
businesses based on producing this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and drink that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
workers are dependent on the selling or making of it, and this industry is a key employer of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
lower income families. These advantages
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that this development is likely to continue for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time.

Nevertheless
, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects are significant. The low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
means that it has become more of a staple diet for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. It is
widely
acknowledged that processed and sugary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are unhealthy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
their widespread consumption
The verb 'concerning' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
is concerning
. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
contains
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
additives, offers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
nutrition, and is
largely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
as responsible for the growing obesity problems around the world.
In addition
, there are links to diabetes, all of which affects the economy
as well
as putting pressure on the healthcare system.
Ultimately
, the problems associated with this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
have an impact on everyone.

In conclusion
, the availability and convenience of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
mean that it is likely to be here to stay.
Nevertheless
, the long-term health effects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that,
on the whole
, this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development. Finding a way to increase the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
would go
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
way to solving this.
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IELTS essay In some places, fast food, prepared meals, and sugary drinks are now sold in more shops and at lower prices than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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