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In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and beginning of university studies.Discuss the advantage and disadvantage for young people who decide to do this.

In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and beginning of university studies. Discuss the advantage and disadvantage for young people who decide to do this. 3E6m
These days, many people are taking a year between finishing high school and beginning of university studies either in order to work or travel. However, there are both merits and demerits of this. In this essay, i will give a try explore both sides. First and foremost, i will start by touching the pros of taking a year. It is broadly believed that if young adults are encouraged to work or travel for a year between two situations, they can benefit like taking an enjoyment. Take working as another example. If young people work for a year, they earn for their future particularly for their university studies. Further example is traveling for a year. If people especially young people travel for a year, they can get a great enjoyment and when they go to university, it can be a factor to study better. Having said that, it should be noted that, having worked for a year youngsters may feel themselves tired which can be an adverse effect on studying. Another issue is that, if young people take a year for traveling, notwithstanding enjoyment, they have tendency to forget most of their know-how and experience. Naturally, this can give rise to negative effects. In conclusion, despite some negative impacts, working or traveling for a year can contribute to their study. Personally, i believe that, young people should travel or work after finishing high school for some months but not a year.
These days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are taking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
between finishing high school and beginning of university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
either in order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
.
However
, there are both merits and demerits of this. In this essay,
Did you mean "I"?
i
will give a try explore both sides.
First
and foremost,
Did you mean "I"?
i
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
by touching the pros of taking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. It is
broadly
believed that if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
adults
are encouraged
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
between two situations, they can benefit like taking an enjoyment. Take working as another example. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, they earn for their future
particularly
for their university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
.
Further
example is traveling for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a great enjoyment and when they go to university, it can be a factor to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
better. Having said that, it should
be noted
that, having worked for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
youngsters may feel themselves tired which can be an adverse effect on studying. Another issue is that, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
for traveling, notwithstanding enjoyment, they have tendency to forget most of their know-how and experience.
Naturally
, this can give rise to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects.
In conclusion
, despite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts, working or traveling for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
can contribute to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
Personally
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
after finishing high school for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
months
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.

IELTS essay In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and beginning of university studies. Discuss the advantage and disadvantage for young people who decide to do this.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
240 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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