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In some countries the elderly is put into nursing homes rather than being taken care of by their family. Do you see this as a positive or a negative development?

In some countries the elderly is put into nursing homes rather than being taken care of by their family. Do you see this as a positive or a negative development? 56BBp
Recently, in some nations, people prefer to put their elderly relatives into nursing houses than dividing task between siblings or even grandchildren to take care of this aged person. Personally, I see this as a beneficial situation for the person who is being taken care of and in this essay, I will discuss some pros and cons regarding this topic. To begin with, even though it is not an easy decision for the family, there are positive outcomes for aged person in this specialised place. To explain, nursing homes are a better infrastructure than a regular person’s house. Over there, there are certain equipment that a regular person’s house certainly would not have. Thus, they are more efficient and rapid regards health assistance if something might occur. Additionally, there are professionals working there full-time to help in any matter the elderly may need. This house is a positive solution to provide professional support to the family. Deepen into this regard, some families use nursing home as a solution to get rid of their old relatives and barely visit them. This is a frequent behaviour of some, unfortunately, and describes perfectly a downside. Families must constantly visit their relatives to surveil the treatment they are receiving, because despite the professionalism expected, they might misconduct with certain situations. Another important point is that a professional does not place a relative, and that is why the family cannot let the loneliness feeling dominate who is living in nursing homes. They need to be present due to preserve a good relationship with their parents or grandparents. In conclusion, with the ageing society, some families opt to put their old relatives into nursing homes instead of taken care by themselves. I see positive consequences, because not only they will be assisted by professionals, but also their relationship with their family will improve.
Recently, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
nations,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer to put their elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relatives
into nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
than dividing task between siblings or even grandchildren to take care of this aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
Personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
this as a beneficial situation for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
who is
being taken
care of and in this essay, I will discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
pros and cons regarding this topic.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
even though
it is not an easy decision for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
outcomes for aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
in this
Possible spelling mistake. 'specialised' is British English.
specialised
place. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
, nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
are a better infrastructure than a regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
. Over there, there are certain equipment that a regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
certainly
would not have.
Thus
, they are more efficient and rapid regards health assistance if something might occur.
Additionally
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professionals
working there full-time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in any matter the elderly may need. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
solution to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professional
support to the family.

Deepen into this regard,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
nursing home as a solution to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relatives
and
barely
visit them. This is a frequent
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
, unfortunately, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describes
perfectly
a downside.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Families
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
constantly
visit their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relatives
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
surveil
the treatment they are receiving,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
despite the professionalism
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
, they might misconduct with certain situations. Another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
point is that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professional
does not place a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relative
, and
that is
why the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the loneliness feeling dominate who is living in nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
. They need to be present due to preserve a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
relationship with their parents or grandparents.

In conclusion
, with the
Possible spelling mistake. 'ageing' is British English.
ageing
society,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
opt to put their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relatives
into nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
instead
of taken care by themselves. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
consequences,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
they will
be assisted
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professionals
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
their relationship with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
.

IELTS essay In some countries the elderly is put into nursing homes rather than being taken care of by their family. Do you see this as a positive or a negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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