Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In some countries, people who are unemployed receive a sum of money each week in the form of a benefit, while some support this, other people believe that this money should not be given. Discuss both points of view and give your own point of view

In some countries, people who are unemployed receive a sum of money each week in the form of a benefit, while some support this, other people believe that this money should not be given. Discuss both points of view and give your own point of view jRb5d
Unemployed people in most of the countries distribute money from the government. Majority of people reckon that it is a good solution whereas others believe that this is destructive way. This essay will intend to articulate the both notions along with my point of view. To embark with, various reasons can be considered behind this approach, why people supply money of those people who has never job. Receiving the benefits of money would have worse impact of people's life. They cannot fullfill their career, for example, these people who are without income they could face many problems such as either they cannot buy basic eminities ( food, clothes) or other fundamental facilities. Additionally, under-privileged people would need extra income to properly provide care their kids as they must be sole breadwinner because they do not have enough time to work for long hours and with the help of earning money they can assist care to children. On the other side, thanks to the financial supports helped by the authorities, it would create a encouragement to people for continuing job. In this way they not only improve their quality of life but also can find comfortable life which is important for them. Besides, group of people mey easily loss their job opportunities because they are eligible for satisfactory life without any efforts, however they are totally depends on unemployed benefits and use it for wrong way, they can do bullying, crime and purchasing drugs as well as alcohol. Money which provided by government it will be waste. In conclusion, people should use income in right way which is assist by governer, however the benefits of payment for unemployed people is important.
Unemployed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in most of the countries distribute
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
. Majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
reckon that it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
solution whereas others believe that this is
Please check whether an article is missing: "a destructive".
destructive
way. This essay will intend to articulate the both notions along with my point of view.

To embark with, various reasons can
be considered
behind this approach, why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
supply
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who has never
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "jobbed".
job
. Receiving the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
would have worse impact of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. They cannot
Possible spelling mistake found.
fullfill
their career,
for example
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are without income they could face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems such as either they cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
basic
Possible spelling mistake found.
eminities
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
food, clothes) or other fundamental facilities.
Additionally
, under-privileged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would need extra income to
properly
provide care their kids as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be sole breadwinner
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to work for long hours and with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
they can assist care to children.

On the other side, thanks to the financial supports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
by the authorities, it would create
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
encouragement to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for continuing job. In this way they not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
can find comfortable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for them.
Besides
, group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
mey
easily
loss their job opportunities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are eligible for satisfactory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
without any efforts,
however
they are
totally
depends on unemployed benefits and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
way, they can
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "go bullying".
do bullying
, crime and purchasing drugs
as well
as alcohol.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Money
which provided by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
it will be waste.
In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
income in right way which is assist by
Possible spelling mistake found.
governer
,
however
the benefits of payment for unemployed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay In some countries, people who are unemployed receive a sum of money each week in the form of a benefit, while some support this, other people believe that this money should not be given. Discuss both points of view and give your own point of view

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
280 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • In some countries, people who are unemployed receive a sum of money each week in the form of a benefit, while some support this, other people believe that this money should not be given. Discuss both points of view and give your own point of view