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In some countries, parents expect children to spend long time studying in and after school and have less free time. Do you think it has the positive or negative effects on children and society that they live in?

In some countries, parents expect children to spend long time studying in and after school and have less free time. Do you think it has the positive or negative effects on children and society that they live in? yJMd
Parents intend their children to study much not only in school but also after school, they expect to have less spare time for their children in some countries too. I completely disagree with this view according to some ideas that I will explain them below and I believe that it can be caused many drawbacks instead of benefits. First of all, I can mention that studying much with a little free time can affect negatively the children’s psychological and physical aspects. Children need entertainment and spare time for relaxing and absorbing information appropriately. Moreover, juveniles’ brain can jeopardize for the overload, because their brain is the period of developing, according to this issue, it is essential that should not exceed the capacity of the brain. There are many ranges of activities for improving the mental and mortal ability and it also boosts up the studying level. Secondly, adolescents can hate the education process related to their parents’ forces, also it can be detrimental, as students can lose their curiosities and interests in studying. For example, more investigations show that adolescents who are exposed to learning without any enthusiasm are rapidly moving away from the learning process, which also affects badly to their future lifestyle. Additionally, pupils can get unnecessary data while learning many topics, in turn, they can not remember the information that is essential for them. Students can face difficulties in separating the themes which are important or not necessary for learning. In conclusion, learning much without any spare time can entirely cause negative aspects on students’ thoughts, activities, health. Parents should be careful in this issue, they should not force their children for studying without any break.
Parents intend their
children
to study much not
only
in school
but
also
after school, they
expect
to have less spare
time
for their
children
in
some
countries too.

I completely disagree with this view according to
some
ideas
that I will
explain
them below and I believe that it can
be caused
many
drawbacks
instead
of benefits.

First of all
, I can mention that
studying
much with a
little
free
time
can affect
negatively
the
children’s
psychological and physical aspects.
Children
need entertainment and spare
time
for relaxing and absorbing information
appropriately
.
Moreover
, juveniles’ brain can jeopardize for the overload,
because
their brain is the period of developing, according to this issue, it is essential that should not exceed the capacity of the brain. There are
many
ranges of activities for improving the mental and mortal ability and it
also
boosts up the
studying
level.

Secondly
, adolescents can hate the education process related to their parents’ forces,
also
it can be detrimental, as students can lose their curiosities and interests in
studying
.
For example
, more investigations
show
that adolescents who
are exposed
to
learning
without any enthusiasm are
rapidly
moving away from the
learning
process, which
also
affects
badly
to their future lifestyle.
Additionally
, pupils can
get
unnecessary data while
learning
many
topics, in turn, they can not remember the information
that is
essential for them. Students can face difficulties in separating the themes which are
important
or not necessary for learning.

In conclusion
,
learning
much without any spare
time
can
entirely
cause
negative
aspects on students’ thoughts, activities, health. Parents should be careful in this issue, they should not force their
children
for
studying
without any break.
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IELTS essay In some countries, parents expect children to spend long time studying in and after school and have less free time. Do you think it has the positive or negative effects on children and society that they live in?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
279 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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