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In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

It is an ongoing debate that house ownership is crucial instead of a rented house for people. Ownership of a house is a need of people for a range of reasons, but I would argue that this is a negative situation because some difficulties are involved in obtaining personal homes. Many people like to obtain their own house due to several advantages. People do not need to pay monthly rent if they have their own houses; they can invest their valuable amount in some other meaningful purposes like in education of their children they can secure their future by giving them a quality of education in a top-class institute. Moreover, if they have their own house, they can live freely. They can decorate it according to their own will; also, they can change its infrastructure according to an ongoing trend. In this way, they do not require to take permission from the house owner. Despite all these benefits, my opinion is contradictory to this. In my opinion, it is a negative situation for some people because not all people are capable enough to buy their own homes. Building their own homes is very expensive, so not all people can afford it. But some people try to get one and want to achieve social status among their peer groups. They take loans which gives them stress for a long period because they have to pay back the loan no matter how. In conclusion, although it is a lot of benefits to living in own homes, it is not good for low-income people, so I believe that rented houses are efficient for them instead of making one for themselves.
It is an ongoing debate that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
ownership is crucial
instead
of a rented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Ownership of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
is a need of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for a range of reasons,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I would argue that this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
situation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
difficulties
are involved
in obtaining personal homes.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like to obtain their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
due to several advantages.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
do not need to pay monthly rent if they have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
; they can invest their valuable amount in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other meaningful purposes like in education of their children they can secure their future by giving them a quality of education in a top-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
institute.
Moreover
, if they have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
freely
. They can decorate it according to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
will;
also
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
its infrastructure according to an ongoing trend. In this way, they do not require
Did you mean “taking”? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, ‘require’ + ‘to’ takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to take
permission from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
owner.

Despite all these benefits, my opinion is contradictory to this. In my opinion, it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
situation for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are capable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
homes. Building their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
homes is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can afford it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
one and want to achieve social status among their peer groups. They take loans which gives them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
for a long period
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay back the loan no matter how.

In conclusion
, although it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits to living in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
homes, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for low-income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I believe that rented
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
are efficient for them
instead
of making one for themselves.
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IELTS essay In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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