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in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation? 0JQl
People in some nations believe that possessing a house is more crucial than chartering. There are several reasons that caused it. I personally, believe that this has positive outcomes. In this essay, I am going to discuss the reason. First, living in a self-own property can make people feels more stable, comfortable, and secure. Having a house is an investment. It is because every year property prices are bound to increase. In this case, that means that family have stability in financial status, when they have financial problem in the future, they can sell their house and it can help them. Besides that, they have permanent residence that makes them feel comfortable and secure because they do not have to move every several months and they know exactly what kind of place they live in. Second, I believe staying in one house can strengthen family bonds and family members can get close to each other. Furthermore, this also reduces the obligation to pay monthly rentals that impose additional stress on families that can impact a lot of problems. Such as, when the parents can not afford more money to pay the rents, they will fight each other and the children can feel depressed and anxiety, that caused they do not feel comfortable when they are in the house. To conclude, in my opinion, stability and security are the main reason why people prefer property ownership instead of renting. However, it is also beneficial for comfortable between all of family members.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
nations believe that possessing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
is more crucial than chartering. There are several reasons that caused it. I
personally
, believe that this has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
outcomes. In this essay, I am going to discuss the reason.

First
, living in a self-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
property can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
feels
more stable,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
comfortable
, and secure. Having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
is an investment. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
every year property prices
are bound
to increase.
In this case
, that means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
have stability in financial status, when they have financial problem in the future, they can sell their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
and it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them.
Besides
that, they have permanent residence that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
comfortable
and secure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
every several
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
months and
they know exactly what kind of place they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in.

Second, I believe staying in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
can strengthen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
bonds and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
close to each other.
Furthermore
, this
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
the obligation to pay monthly rentals that impose additional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
that can impact
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
problems. Such as, when the parents can not afford more money to pay the rents, they will fight each other and the children can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
depressed and anxiety, that caused they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
comfortable
when they are in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.

To conclude
, in my opinion, stability and security are the main reason why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer property ownership
instead
of renting.
However
, it is
also
beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
comfortable
between all of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members.
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IELTS essay in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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