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In some countries, only few young people go to classical music concerts or or play classical music. Why? Should young people be encouraged to attend and learn more?

In some countries, only few young people go to classical music concerts or or play classical music. Why? Should young people be encouraged to attend and learn more? y9El
Classical music is the form of music from which music originated so it is important for younger generations to know the roots and origin of music which i feel is a very important trait that we must pass down generations. In many countries younger people don't listen to classical music because their parents don't teach them long standing cultures and traditions. Culture and traditions are those which defines who we are and from what we came such deep stuff should be passed down generations. Parents should take them to classical music concerts, imposing good ideals once wont make u a bad parent. I feel if classical music is introduced to them the younger generations will definitely like it and they will start enjoying the beauty of such divine music. Younger generations in western countries are the ones that least go to classical music concerts, the reason being as i said before is less number of parents who pass down cultures, history and traditions to their young ones. Unless they impose such ideals the situation would remain. Comparatively u could see more younger people in southeast asian countries enjoying classical reason being they pass down cultures and traditions to their younger generations. Being the younger generation they do have a role to know and learn their history so that they can pass that to the forthcoming generations that being said classical music should be advised to younger generations so that they appreciate their predecessors. There is nothing wrong in liking other kinds of music like pop, trans, rock etc what is wrong is that is to dislike classical music without giving it a shot. So please encourage the younger generations to give it a try
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is the form of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
from which
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music
originated
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so
it is
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important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
generations to know the roots and origin of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
which
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
feel is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
trait that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
pass
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down
generations. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries
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younger
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
don't listen to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
don't teach them
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
long standing
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cultures
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Culture
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
are those which defines who we are and from what we came such deep stuff should
be passed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
down
generations.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
should take them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
concerts, imposing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
ideals once
Please make sure you mean 'wont' (a habit), not "won't"/"won’t" (short for 'will not')?
wont
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
u a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
. I feel if
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classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is introduced
to them the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
generations will definitely like
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
it and
they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
enjoying the beauty of such divine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Younger
generations in western countries are the ones that least go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
concerts, the reason being as
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
said
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
is less number of
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parents
who pass
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down
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
, history and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
to their young ones.
“Unless” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Unless
they impose such ideals the situation would remain.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Comparatively
u could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
more
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younger
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people
in southeast
Possible spelling mistake found.
asian
countries enjoying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
reason being they pass
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down
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cultures
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
generations. Being the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
generation they do have a role to know and learn their history
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can pass that to the forthcoming generations that
being said
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
should
be advised
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
generations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they appreciate their predecessors. There is nothing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
in liking other kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
like pop, trans, rock etc what is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
is
that is
to dislike
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
without giving it a shot.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
encourage the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
generations to give it a
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
try
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IELTS essay In some countries, only few young people go to classical music concerts or or play classical music. Why? Should young people be encouraged to attend and learn more?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
283 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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